this is going to be short: I"ve been looking all over for a job and decided togo to the hospital to look into volunteering, they may have some office jobs I could do. Maybe I can put the stuff I learned if my medical billing class to good use. I'm also looknig into other things, like "mystery shopper." I saw it on one site and I"m researching it right now. Maybe it'll be an interesting profession to get into!!!

THis time of year really brings me down. Not just because of the situation I'm in now, but I always get down thinking about my past and the problems I've had. It's not that it made the holdiays suck, but just I remember how it was just having my problems through the holidays and it gets me a little sad. This year I also an down because right before Christmas last year, my Uncle passed away. This was the Uncle I drove my Aunt and cousin to see in the hospital on the Island 5 days a week for almost 3 months. I remember the Sunday before Christmas getting the call and thinking how sad it was, but also how good it is that now he doesn't have to suffer anymore. I really felt bad for my cousin, who's birthday is on Christmas eve, and he had to deal with all this. I know it won't be too great this year, but I do hope he does find some joy in the holiday.

"what do you want for Christmas?" that's whatI've been hearing the past couple days. Well, I have no damnclue what I want, and I dont' think I deserve anything. Why do you aks? Well, because I don't think I've done anything good to warrent my getting something from ayone this year. Sounds stupid I know, but that's how I feel. Funny part is, I like giving people gifts, material or other...guess 'cause i'm nice guy. Oh well, I have to give my parents an answer soon....I doubt they would be able to get me a hot chick that would cherish and love me!!! I have to ask them how much they want to spend, and make some choices from there...