a simple post

Well the World Cup is over for the US now.  They lost their last match and didn’t’ make it past the first round.  The team overall I thought did well, but playing in Europe is a problem, since it seems the refs tend to favor the other team no matter who the US is playing (look at the last game, and tell me that the calls the “world’s best ref” made were correct!)

On the bright side, the Mets are still kicking ass!!!  Just had to mention that.

Now for all the kiddies that read this (yes I’m only 27, but I feel like 47 sometimes, especially my ankle), I have something to tell you.  I had someone recently ask me how do I make things seem simple, or how does things seem so simple to me.  The reason is that I have learned in the past 27 years (but really applied what I have learned) that life it self is simple.  You get up in the morning, you do your thing, and then you go to sleep in the evening.  The only time life gets complicated is when you think it is complicated.  I find that if you over think anything (and yes I am still a victim of this-it’s human nature), that’s when stress comes into your life, and what is in front of you looks complicated.  Look it this way, I am considered one of the best employees at my job.  How did I get at this point? I just looked at what my responsibilities are, and just did them and stayed focused on the task.  In my mind I have the attitude of “I did what I was told to do, if they like what and how I did my job, cool, if not, then I have to do it a little better or different.”  See, simple, and this is how I look at all the tings in my life.  Nothing there to complicate it, and if something does come up, I just look at the “problem” and see what that I am doing now can be modified and over come the problem.

Sounds stupid? Then why is it when one looks for answers to a question or solution to a puzzle in their lives, does the simplest solution always end up being the right or most correct one.  Whenever there is a problem in my life, I just look at it and go “OK, what is the actual problem?” and then just sit calmly and realize that if I just do one thing or say the right words, the problem is solved.

Well that’s enough of my stupid mind working, maybe the Guru here will have something else for you to read in the future.

a nice quickie for you

Just posting something quick here.  The heat sucks, and I sweat my ass off in the summer.  Just letting you know if you happen to be near me.  But now I have an air conditioner in my room now, so I won’t be waking up all dehydrated!!!

Job thing is going ok.  I am starting to get used to the schedule, which has me going in at 7am on Mondays to handle the milk delivery. It’s not a big deal since I don’t have to worry about anything else when I do the milk.  It’s a 12-hour day on Mondays, but that and the regular 7 hours I get the rest of the week means I get 40 hours now.  I also get some other responsibilities put on me, but they aren’t really a big deal.  They are more just extensions of some of my old ones.

World Cup has been interesting.  The US finally grew a pair and showed up against the Italians.  They need to win against Ghana and hope the Italians beat the Czechs.  If the US did show up and played like a real team in the first game, they probably wouldn’t’ be in this situation.  The other two teams I am paying attention are the English and the Dutch.  The English team I like to watch since I ‘m used to seeing all the players play in English matches on cable, and some of them are pretty damn good.  The Dutch have always intrigued me.  They have a culture and style of players and player development that is one of the best styles in the world, and the team they always produce are a real team, not a collection of stars.  Even the Dutch league matches are well-played and entertaining to watch.

That’s all the crap I got now.  I’m just going to chill with the AC on and maybe come up with more worthless garbage for you to waste your time reading.

just a 'lil update

Man what a week or two.  I’m tired from work’s new schedule, but at least I’m getting a full 40 hours now.  Good thing too since I owe my mom some money for my car insurance (it’s still under her name and she paid for it already before I got the chance to give her the money).  Os to paraphrase one of my comics Rich Vos, “I owe my mom money for the car insurance, and I’m dodging her!!!”

I went to my dad’s grave recently to see the engraving of his name on it.  It was surreal to finally see that on the stone (before it was just my Aunts name and dates).  In a way it was also a good thing, that I can finally say it’s over, and that nothing from the whole experience is still “pending” or out there to worry about as far as I am concerned.  It’s a cool feeling that things aren’t on my shoulders.

It’s a great time now to watch TV. The world Cup is on, and everyday there’s at least one game I want to see.  Thank god for the DVR and I can record them while I’m at work. So far all the games I’ve seen have been good, other than the US shitting the bed and putting themselves behind the 8-ball.  Who the hell knows maybe this will clear all the hype and then they can play the way they are supposed to do and make some noise in the tournament.  

Along with the soccer, there’s also some great TV shows on now.  I especially like “Rescue Me” on FX, and on HBO there’s “Lucky Louie” (HBO’s try at the traditional sitcom, but beter with curses and better material) and  “Dane Cook’s Tourgasm” (Documentary of a comedy tour with 4 psychotic comics ho are some of the funniest guys around).    If you can, check them out, you might like them.  

So you see, I’m boring still, and the only reason I wrote this is because I felt like updating it.

the symbol I most believe in when it comes to life

I wanted to take this time to share with something I really believe in, and the symbol it takes.  I always believe that in life you are at some form of a balance.  What I mean is that if you ever feel something good and feel a lot of it, life has a way to do something bad to ring everything back into balance.  The same obviously works the other way as well, where when you are at your lowest, something comes along and bring joy and happiness into your life to balance your life again.  This doesn’t’ happen right away often, but sometimes it takes years to happen.  I believe in all this so much that in high school I had the symbol put on my class ring, and if I were to ever get a tattoo, it would be this symbol (but I can’t get a tattoo ever, would feel guilty since my dad HATED tattoos)

I have been looking back on my life since my father’s passing (which on June 5th is the 6-month anniversary of his passing, so don’t be shocked if I’m a little down, just pass a kind word to your ol’ pal), and I have noticed what I believe in is true and has happened in my life.  Take for example:

-When I had bad eyes, it sucked but I found out that I have a family that is supportive, helpful to almost a fault, and fiercely protective of me, so that helped me be not so sad about my eyes.  

-When they were fixed, and things are going well, I get hit with my ankle problems.  SO for two years I was down because I really couldn’t hang out with friends and really enjoy the high school experience.  But from all that trouble, money came up and that helped me go to college.  

-During college I learned what I needed for the real world, and I really was in a “high” with the accomplishment of graduating from an esteemed school (yeah it was a state school, but check out some of the programs that are world-renound, bitches!!).  After college though, the real world kicked my ass and it led to a deep sadness (maybe depression but I never was checked out for it) with no work and a feeling of failure.  Once again, friends and family did things to really make me feel like a person again and gave me confidence in myself.  

-When my life was starting to look like it’s getting back on track, my father passing brought everything back into check, and eventually back to sadness because he was not around.  What did help me come back into balance is the fact that I now have a job that I don’t mind and that all I learned form him I am putting into practice and are now seeing some improvement in my life.

Even just recently as last weekend, I was at such a high, that something came along and knocked me down and it left me in a funk for a bit.  After some wise words from someone and evaluating that I was not the one at fault, and shouldn’t regret or feel guilty for what happened, I am now back into a balance and starting to feel at peace.

One thing I always liked about the Ying-Yang symbol is that in both sides there is a little of the other.  I always believed that what that meant is that even in all that good, there is a little bad you must accept, and in all that bad, there is good in the form of a lesson one must take from it.  I always took something form my failures and sadness, and those are the most important things to remember in life.  Those lessons you learn from anything negative are the foundation of life, and all the goodness in life are rewards from the lessons learned from the negative.

All I can say is that I am done looking for “happiness”, I’ve been trying to do that in life, and so far it isn’t happening.  What will I look for now?  Nothing really, but I’m going to just live life.  If I do find someone special and she sticks around for a while, cool.  If I’m stuck alone all my life, that’s ok too because I know there is going to be something else in my life that makes everything balanced.  That’s not to say I won’t be doing things that make me happy, but I am don’t’ looking for things in like to make me happy, because in the 27 years I’ve been alive, it’s not there.  I know that this goes against my new whole “thinking positive” attitude, but when I look for something to make me happy, I forget about what I got, and that should always be the first things one should look at, because there’s always something positive there.

I think I’m done rambling on.  Anyway hope you got something out of this.  I don’t know what you were supposed to get out of it, but if you did get something out of it cool.