Ok, this holiday weekend was one of my worst I've ever had to endure in my 26 years on this planet. One day, One damn day is all I wanted to NOT think about any of my problems, and enjoy a day of football, food, and drinking. Do you think my family would be considerate of my situation and at most limit any questions/suggestions to a minimum?? OF COURSE NOT!!!! I think I only got about 3 minutes of what I wanted, then the questions and suggestions came for the entire damn night!!!! It just got too damn much. Eventually, I started giving wiseass answers (maybe that'll finally give them an idea I'd rather not stay on this subject), but then they get angry at me...topper of the entire thing: my aunt telling me "I don't want you to see you screw up your life!" Now, if she wasn't my Aunt but my Uncle, i would have started swinging right then and there......At least my father had the class and consideration to try to steer the conversation off of me and to something else. Well partly it did happen, they started praising my sister and my cousin's kids...not only to be nice but i'm sure to rub this all in my face (I can tell by how they were talking and how some looked DIRECTLY at me after saying some compliments). After this night with people I'm supposed to be thankful to have them around me, I came to a couple conclusions:

1. Whenever there's a family get together, I take my car.....i will not be stuck in a hell like that again!
2. Christmas, these people show up here, i've made it clear to my parents and sister to let them know this treatment will not be accepted here, and it will be dealt with in some form.

Sorta makes what I said in another post seem like a lie, but this was only part of the family, others do show more respect to me....

So the entire weekend this was on my mind (still is to a point, I mean, how often is it when it's you against an entire house of your relatives who have delusionl ideas as to how it is in the world today). At least my trip to Jersey yesterday was fun, got my mind off all this for at least a couple hours.

As far as sports go, My G-Men lost again (but it's not Eli's fault, the past two starts were only agaisnt the 2 best teams in the NFC!!). Still no hockey, but my Rangers on Sega's NHL 2K5 are in the playoffs, this is after I traded all the overpriced leeches (Lindros, Jagr, Holik, Dunham, Bure...you know the "stars") and got draft picks and younger players (even got Dany Heatley from the Thrashers). In soccer, Man U looks like they're finally getting off their (as the Brits like to say) arses and are now winning again....they won over this weekend and last Wed. beat Lyon, the French League Champions in a UEFA Champions League match, which pretty much qualified Man U for the knockout phase of the tourny. The Mets look like they are going to add Pedro, but also resigned Kris Benson, which means his wife may be around the town for a couple years...and men rejoiced at the news!!! (he's also a good pitcher, so that's a bonus).

On another note: thanks to ESPN Radio here in NYC, whenever I hear Eli Manning's name, I start to hear "Eli's Coming" by (I believe) Three Dog Night...they played this song for the first month he was with the team, and it's stuck in my head. Other songs I hear in my head from time to time include a "I Walk The Line" cover by Los Lonely Boys (actually a great cover), and the cover of "Another Brick In The Wall" by Korn (it's good, but I expected more for some reason).

Last night, I couldn't sleep. So I decided to put down all the things I"m grateful for, being that this time of year you should be thankful for what you got. Here's some of the major things I'm grateful for:

My Parents - They gave me life, and sacrificed a whole hell of a lot for me and my sister (especially when it came to the surgeries for me eyes and ankles.) I may have not have done the right thing all the time and I may have disappointed them a few times, but they have shown all the unconditional love that you would expect from parents, but much more than that to me.

My Family -I am thankful that I have a family that shows me the respect and love one deserves, even though we may differ greatly in our opinions. The fact that they do tell me what I should do or whatever they do or say to try and help me shows that they care for me. I am grateful a famlily that is opinionated as they are, it makes things fun at get togethers!!!

I am also thankful to have three particular cousins in my life. Butch, Ralphie, and Paul have always pushed me to do my best no matter what. Paul was always the one in my life to give me the calm, rational advice on things, even if I wanted to hear it or not. In he end, whatever he said usually ended up being right (just ask about the last Election!)

Butch, my cousin and Godfather, always helped me look at things in the most simplest way, whiched helped me solve a lot of things. He always makes the most complex things look simple, and he has always been supportive of whatever I chose to do, good or bad.

Ralphie, who honored me by making me his best man at his wedding, has always been my "go to" guy when I needed help. All I have to do is call him and he hears me out and helps me through my problems. He had a way to make me see the answer through humor , which helped lessened the tension and anxiety, which helped me tremendouslywhen coming upwith a solution.

My friends - I have gained and lost a lot of friends in my life. They, like my family, have supported me and helped me out of problems and issues I had through gestures and words. I don't know where i would be without them. Everyday, my friends are there to listen to my inane BS, and they would listen without teling me to shut up. I can't name them all here, since there are a lot of them, but all have helpedme become who I am, and I'm thankkful for that

With all of these people , I owe them all. What they have done for me was beyond what they had to dofor me. I would like to repay them all for what they have done, I doubt that I would be able to, they have done so much. I am thankful for everything in my life, especially these people.

I"m drunk right now, so i'll keep it short.....today was a good day. Got up at 7 this morning, after sleeping for the longest I have in a week (since 11pm last night). Got up and went into my living room to watch some EPL soccer. I turn it on, and lo nd behold....MAN U IS ON!!!! thi is big because this is the first time I am going to get to see a game live on tv (usualy I have to catch the replay of the previous week's game on Wed.) So I was amped, and after a fantastic showing Man U came out on top 2-0. So this was a fine start to the day. After, I went showered, shaved, and felt even better. I had to go to the hospital to see my aunt who was rushed there earlier in the morning. After visiting her, I came home and hung out.

My parents had a bunch of their old friends come over for dinner. SO after drinking and eating, I was stuffed and drunk. I go to my room and go online. After talking to a bunch of people (and apparently making them feel better, or so they say), I called someone and talked to them for over an hour. While all this, I was watching the Mosely-WInky fight on HBO. It was a good fight, where I thoght either guy could have won, but WInky won (and how badass are you that you have the nickname WInky, but he could kick my ass everyday of the week, and twice on SUnday). SO now I"m typing this and I"m going to go to bed soon.

This entire day I've been on auto-pilot. I didn't sleep at all last night. I just had a ton of things on my mind.

Last night, I was chatting with someone that said I was "sweet and polite", and that she found that to be different. I was thinking about this: I'm a minority of the guys out there. I can't treat a woman like garbage like a lot of guys do...it's just not in me. Yet, these are the guys who usually get the chicks. AllI do is respect the woman, and try to be as good as I can be to her. Another thing I've been noticing is that women like guys like me, just that they think when I'm being myself, tht i'm just trying to fool them into dropping theuir guard in order to hurt them in some way, and that's farther from the truth.

Then again, being so nice has gotten me hurt by women as well. I tend to trust them too much, and in the end they are shady and dishonest...something they claim they aren't and don't like guys who are. Yey for some reason, I tend to not learn from it, and keep going on my path. Butlike I said, it's something in me that makes me be so nice and all, and that does get me in trouble...oh well it's my problem.

Also, not to be a broken record, job hunt still sucks, but i continue on. just frustrates me to no end that Igive outmy resume, and get nothing back...it keeps me up at night that I feel like a loser that i'm 26, have no job, and the near future doesn't look good so far.

Eh, I don't know, then again I'm half asleep now, so I'm just rambling on here....thinkI'll end it there and see what I can come up with tomorrow.

What a horrible day. Woke up today to my alarm going off. I got up, turned it off, and sat on my bed and watched tv. next thign I remember, I was laying down on my bed and noticed that the time was 1/2 hour later then my alarm. Well this put me in an irritated mood. So I go take my shower, changed my clothes and then started my daily job search. For some reason, my computer was acting funny, so I ran my spyware detecting program and then my anti virus program. This took a while to do, so even more time wasted. In the end I got it all cleared up and now I can fax my stuff to some companies.
At this point (12 noon), I go out for my daily walk. Well, for the most part it went well, just halfway home, my ankle started to bother me...this is just great, going to limp for the rest of the damn day. When I get home, I continue doing my job search thing (after reading the papers and looking at the ads in there). Then from then to now, I just felt bad. Not sick, just not good. It's hard to explain. So I lay down for a bit and also play some videogames just to take my mind off of stuff (played NHL hockey 2k5, since it's the only way I can see any hockey this season!!). After that, nothing really exciting, jsut made some pfone calls and watched the US soccer team play Jamaica tonight on TV.
Also started to put applications in for seasonal work at retail stores, though seeing the stack of aplications at some of the places, it doesn't look too good for me. Also doesn't help when Ionly speak one language (god forbid that would be enough these days!!!)
Saturday, My parents are having some of their friends over for dinner, so I"m looking for something to do Sat night to get out of the house. If I don't find somewhere to go (most likely going to happen), I'll probably be Mr. anti-social and stay in my room the whole time. Not that I don't like these people, I never met some of them, just I don't want to hang around them when I could be hanging around people my age

Another SUnday night, another weekend where I really didn't get to do anything interesting. Mostly I just drove around to different hobby shops to look around. I havent' done anything R/C related in a long time (both my cars are down until I get the $$$ to fix them). Itwas cool though just to go to the shopa and hang out. I did learn that one of my car's engines isnt' gonig to cost me nearly as much as i thought it would, since the shop I went to was a participant in a exchange program witht he manufacturer wher I take my old engine (a paperweight at this point), and for $105 I get a brand new one. That's cheaper than $150+ I owuld be spending on the same engine if I don't go through this program.

Scum 3-KC 2 in the finals of the MLS cup....so MLS got the assclown his title, and they got the exposure they wanted. Hopefully next season things will go back to normal and I won't have to keep thinking that MLS is rigged worse that most pagents

Today I felt great outside. I like the cold weather, it keeps me awake. I always loved working in this weather when I worked in TV. I just felt great out there in the cold air, plus everyone else worked harder so they could get back in the warm trucks!!!

and so goes another dull-ass day in my dull-ass life!!!!

You know it's sad when you're looking for work on a Sat., but that's just what I did. Yes, I still haven't gotten any real hits on my job search. It really sucks out there, and stop giving me that BS that things are getting better. Oh really? then why is it that I"ve been applying to the SAME jobs on different sites and in the papers. Also, if there's so much new job growth, why the hell aren't there any NEW post/ads in the paper!!!

Now, I know people mean well and all...BUT STOP GIVING ME ADVICE OR TELLING ME HOW I SHOULD DO THIS!!!! When you are looking for a job, you had a whole diffrent situation. Please, please, please stop asking "why don't you go to..." because I already did that probably. Another thing; I can't to camerawork anyomore because my ankle acts up a whole lot, I have no connections in the industry to get me a job anyway (at least one that is reliable), and I have no real desire to go back into it. All I want is a job that pays me, preferably one in an office where I"m not killing myself and my ankle.

I'm looking at temp agencies too, and even though I call eeryday to say I'm available, they got nothing for me (this is on top of scoreing 80 on both Word and Excel program tests and averaging 35 WPM on the typing test). Still I call to see in it's possible to get some assignment through them (even left a voicemail today with one on their system saying I'm available!)

Ho Hum, nother weekend gone to hell, but that's the protocol here in my life....

Well, the past couple days haven't really been too exciting. I spent it helping out some relatives with stuff. Other than that, nothing much else happened. Today was the first time I didn't have my alarm set to get up this morning. Today I got up at 10 this morning, usually I get up a 8 to start my day of looking for work and do errands. The thing is I go to bed at like 2 (but fall asleep at 3) am. WHat I do at night you ask?
1. look for a job,
2. talk to my peeps,
3. look at internet sites
4. and think

God my life is boring!!! I got to get some friends to hang out, but also some money to have to get some friends to go hang out!!!

I just read that the new governorof NJ killed the plans for the Metrostars stadium in Harrison, but somehow making the county it's going to be in not pass the bond issue to finance it. Well, this is the last straw with this assclown. SInce he's been GM o fthe team, he hasn't improved the team's situation. This stadium deal was supposed to be his baby, and now he's dropped it on it's head. This past entire season, all I heard form him was "it's comeing, it'll be here soon..." now NOTHING!!!! Apparently, it's not dead, but since the team has said nothing, it's a sure bet that something's not right...BTW there ws supposed to be a training facility/office for the club in another part of Jersey...that was supposed to be built now.....

Still no hockey, but that' s ok, I got soccer on TV. I also read that the Mets are looking to get rid of Piazza. I personally ould keep him and leave him a catcher, then try for a cheap first baseman off the free agent/scrap heap. They want to get Greene from LA, since he's a good first baseman/right fielder, but I would like to see the Mets be forced to develop some more players (which would be cheaper). Another thing on my mind is that my G-MEN (NY Giants), have no defense anymore. Michael Strahan tore a pectoral Muscle, while a couple other players are out for a while...I see the Giants barely make the playoffs with a 10-6 record, since it's going to be hell to get a wildcard slot in the NFC.

Today, I got to help my cousin out moving some stuff of his to a storage space (proving what Denis Leary said once, "Guys, If you plan on getting married.....put your sh*t in storage, you'll have no say in the interior decoration of your place!!!). SO we got a van, filled it with stuff (mostly his comic collection, along with whatecer stuff he wanted) and put in his space. He got a small spot for $55, which for what other places were charging for the same size spot, isn't that bad.

came home after that, made some lunch and watched the "Superclassico" (Argentina's River Plate and Boca Juniors). This is a big deal there since both are the most storied teams in the country. IT's like when the NY Giants and Brooklyn Dodgers played here in NYC...fierce rivals with passionate fans. Well After this, got to watch the NY football Giants take the lead, and blow it and lose to the Chicago Bears.

What an exciting life I live huh?

Ever walked or driven past somewhere and have bad feelings come back after remembering something abut that spot? I had that today driving to and from Brooklyn today. Iwas going down Woodhaven Blvd. (on my way to the belt parkway), and got to around Ozone park. All of a suden I remembered a woman I used to talk to (and even met). Well, the entire trip to and form where I was going I was thinking of her and about how things were left (she after we met wouldn't give me the time of day, so I stopped bothering talking/calling/emailing her). It jsut sucked that I had this on my mind for a bit. I tried to get it out of my mind, but it was still there. SO when I got home, my dumbass wrote her an email saying I was thiking of her today...who knows maybe she'll wrote/call back....then again, maybe they'll be selling ski parkas in Hell soon!!!!

Don't Blame me...I voted for Quimby!!!!

-So Bush wins...and I can care less, either way the world would still hate us..I have nothing really to say about it except that at least this time it's a legit ending. Good for him, and it's sad that now all freedon of expression will not disappear, especially after his Jesus freak friends get more control over the Supreme Court and the FCC.

-The NBA started this week.....AND STILL NO F*CKING HOCKEY!!! at this point, the union and NHL are a step above childish name-calling.....so it could be a while till something comes of it

-so the weekend's upon us, and I ain't got sh*t to do!!!! but I'll probably do what I usually do: try to have the most fun no money can buy!!!

and that's all I got right now...but one more thing: and ode to DC Scum

Warning!!! Not work friendly!!! you night get fired if you look at it