I survived the first RBNY home game of the season. I got a sunburn on my head and face, and from all the standing and jumping, I couldn’t walk after the game. With that and my Arthritis, I got home sat down, and couldn’t get up for three hours. I am either getting old, or I’m just not in shape for soccer season. I have contemplated for my health I may have to stay with baseball. Not much jumping and being obnoxious at a baseball game than at a soccer game.

This week Penn State gets to fight to see if they can be number 66 in the nation. They are in the NIT semifinals, and I’m may be going Tuesday night. I got to see about tickets and where some people I know are going to be, but it should be interesting. Hopefully Penn State will beat the scum from Notre Dame.

One thing that did upset me Saturday night, besides the Red Bull fuckup that led them to only getting one point rather than the three they could have gotten, was a commercial I heard driving home. It was a chemical dependancy program which says they can scientifically end someone’s addiction in like a few days. What got me was the shot they took at some programs with the line “Who has time to go away for 28 days, and to do what? talk and pray?” I’m not a person in any program, I haven’t had an addiction problem, but I’ve known a few recovering addicts. That line pissed me off because what this program is not just offering is a “quick-fix” to a problem, but it also goes along with the fucked up mentality of this country where the person doesn’t have to take responsibility for their actions during the addiction caused-it’s always someone/thing else’s fault. Programs like AA make the person take responsibility for their actions and man up to the pain and damage they did. They have to go to the people they hurt and apologize, they have to do right where they did wrong. And above all, they have to accept and deal with the ramifications of what their addiction caused.

Personally, if anyone goes to this program where all they do is get shot up with some chemicals and pop some pills, they are still a coward and a scumbag for still running away from their problems. If someone what’s toe “get clean”, it includes cleaning out their soul and personal shit they have damaged and destroyed, along with their physical bodies. God bless those who go through the programs where they have to be broken down and rebuilt, that shows real courage and balls to me. Anyone who doesn’t complete this task is a coward and deserves whatever pain they get or even death. Same goes for anyone who tries this “quick-fix”.

Bottom line: you want show you got balls, go the AA/program route, if you want to still be a coward and a scumbag, do this science program.

Ok I’ve been doing a lot of thinking the past few days. I’ve been trying to improve myself and learn from some things that have been going on. This included a lot of thinking of some of the things that have happened, how they could have turned out different if I learned what I was supposed to learn earlier. But then again, all these things happened for a reason, and it put me where I am now.

One other thing I was thinking of is some things to write here. I was thinking of doing some gimmick posts, to see if I can make some of you people laugh. The one I always threw around was to write an entry like how a wrestling promo. Soon after I thought of it, I realized how hard it would be. The two greatest wrestlers on the mic ere Dusty Rhodes and Ric Flair. These are the two guys I look up on Youtube and marvel at the skills these guys and how they were to help move the story-line they were in, or even help build up the other wrestler. I couldn’t write that well, and to write what they say would look annoying to read and write. I thought of how it would be to try to write as, say, Dusty Rhodes, it would be inane ramblings about America and how it’s the land of opportunities, and to get his lisp into writing would be impossible. Also I couldn't get the “soul” he had in his voice which made his promos sound so cool. I certainly couldn’t write as Flair. First off instead of inane ramblings about America, it would be inane ramblings about being the best at everything and what it’s like to be a limousine riding, jet flying, wheeling-dealing, kiss stealing, son-of-a-bitch. As well as all this, both randomly during sentences, and at breaks, i would have to put some “WOOOOOOOOO!!!”s in it. On top of it, I can’t write me in the middle of the rant me taking off my jacket, throwing it on the floor, running around it as well as dropping elbows on the jacket. It’s just too much work.

One other thing I’ve been thinking of is more brainstorming. I said I wanted to put up a small site of myself, and I haven’t had a chance to get really into it, due to family things. I have a basic idea how I want it set up

-A welcome page-where it welcomes the person to my site, and has the links to other parts.
-A bio page-where I talk about myself professionally and personally. I was thinking of putting up a paragraph or two about my past job history and what I’ve done and accomplished. Also a paragraph or two as well about my personal life. Or simply combine the two. I also threw out on Twitter the idea of having some people write a short summary about me-both good and bad parts of me. My idea was to tell people what email address to write to, and write a short paragraph about me. I’d give a time-span to do it, and whatever I get I’ll look at and put up some of them. Again, this is what i’ve thought of doing and nothing concrete.
-Resume-simply, redo my resume and simply put up there and maybe get a job offer or two.
-Blog-this thing here, though maybe not. I may keep it and redo it a bit to match the theme of the site I would be making. One big thing that came up was form a friend of mine asking if the content would change since I would be really putting my name on here and identifying myself with this. I won’t since I simply don’t buy into the fear-mongering. I don’t buy into the whole “what if an employer sees what you say and that could cost you a job.” If it does, so be it, and why would I want to work at a place that wants to control me both on the job and when I am not. I will not be scared to “to the line” for anyone or anything. I think and believe in what I do and won’t be told what to think. At work I do what I am hired to do, and I will play be the rules. Once I am out of the job, that’s MY time and I will do what I want. So I won’t change the content. I will be changing the name as I said, and maybe modify the layout.
-Links/social media-in essence a page of links to people and things I like and enjoy, as well links to my social media pages/tools like Facebook, Myspace, and IM names. Also my twitter feed here as well, or on the front page.
-Photos/videos-just stuff I shoot either still photos or videos. I still have the bug a bit and would like to continue to do it as a goof.

So you see I have an idea what I want. I do have some things to work out, like hosting but I have some leads on that. I could probably use MobileMe’s space that I have, since most of these pages would be not really huge. The traffic shouldn’t be more than the 200gig/month limit they offer, but who knows. I could simply get hosted somewhere, but i have to see how much a month it would cost me. One thing is do I keep my blog here, or move it as well. If I move it, then the archive is gone-I won’t keep up all the old posts and at most three or four posts at a time. Blogger makes it simple, so it’s tempting to just rename this and change the link name, and just link to here.

I also have to figure out a basic layout, probably something simple like one person I admire, Steve Jobs. He has a simplistic attitude to what he does, but it is also elegant. If you ever see how his keynotes are constructed, the simplicity is amazing considering what he does in how he projects the message and the power that message usually has.

One other consideration is that I need some better pics of me if I wanted tp put some up so people know what the hell I look like!!!

I welcome suggestions and ideas if you all have any. Please bring them.

one final note. I got “Peggle” for the Mac. It really is like crack. Look the game up, and even though it looks stupid, it’s highly addictive like how “Tetris” was. Try it out.

OK, enough, I am done

Remember when the weekend was to relax from a hard week of work? This weekend was anything but, and I am going into work Monday not anymore rested than I was after the workday ended Friday. I”m actually more work out both physically, and as well as mentally.

FYI, for parts of this think of the song “Jump into the Fire” by Harry Nillson as you read this entry. Those who get what I am referencing to will laugh. Those who don’t obviously do not watch Scorcese films. No, I didn’t see any helicopters, by the way

Friday night I went to do “things” with my cousin (the cover story for preparing for his wife’s surprise baby shower). We had to go to the site where it was going to be set up and start putting the tables and chairs out. We get that done and put all the covers on the tables and all that fun stuff.

I figure after that and hanging out at a friends house I can get some rest. Well, I knew I had to be up at 8:30 to get stuff for the shower itself and get some personal business done, so naturally with that on my mind, I didn’t sleep at all. When the alarm went off, I got up, took a shower, downed as much caffeinated-filled things I could find, and headed out. I go pick up a friend who was helping organizing this shower to pick up the cake. Along the way we pick up her cousin who was helping with setting up the place. We had to go back to my friend’s place a second time to pick up the party favors, meaning in a half-hour I travelled about 10 blocks in Astoria-in a circle. We then go to the place where the party is, open up the room and start setting up. I hang around for a little while as my friends and another cousin of mine set things up. Then I jumped back into my car and went to my house to get my mom and sister to bring to this party. We get back, help get people into the room where we were, and then when the food arrived and was being set up, the beans were cold. My cousin told me to go to her place a block over and get her microwave. I run over to get it, which included me getting my balls broken by her husband that I was really manly doing this shower. I bring it into the room, noticed there was a microwave on top of the fridge.....

Anyway, it was time for the moment where the surprise is revealed. At this time looking at the room and it being a surprise, I had the vision of a scene from “GoodFellas” where Pesci thought he was going to be “made” and was killed. I should show you pics and video of this room and you will get the same impression. But as I had this thought and was trying not to laugh out loud, the door opens and everyone screams surprise. Had the surprisee say “oh no”, I would have been on the floor laughing.

So the shower went on, and I will not go into details as far as my commentary since it isn’t relevant and not accurate as to how nice of a day it was-She was happy, everything else doesn’t matter. One funny thing came from my mom, asking my if my friend who also was pregnant was married to my other friend who was gay. After almost laughing from the question (needed given what how things were with me at the moment), I explained things to my mom.

OK, so after all the gifts were packed into cars and things were cleaned up, I took my mom and sister home. Rest of the night was not a nice person to be around, and thank God I called my cousin. Had I not, things would have been done and said that would have done a lot bad than good. I really don’t want to get into details why I was in the state I was, since it is irrelevant, but I disagreed with a few things that day, and I felt like what I did to resolve said disagreements were ignored. That’s all I have to say. Anyone wondering what happened exactly, don’t bother asking. As I said it’s irrelevant and over with. Anyone still going to be a pain in the ass about it, ask me directly, other people were told not to say anything. OK, I know now I have a few things that i have to work on, and that was pointed out. I’m trying, that’s as much as I can say.

Well after the talk and cooling off a bit, I dozed off for a bit. Now, what happens when you sleep for a little bit before you actually go to sleep?? YOU CAN’T SLEEP RIGHT WHEN YOU TRY TO. I went to bed about 11 that night, and woke up at 4:30am. Since then I just laid there not really sleeping. the alarm went off and now it was time to get the last leg of this weekend off.

My cousin picks me up to get the van at U-Haul. We get it and I drive his car home while he drives the van back to his place. Today’s task is to take the futon in his place down to his in-law’s in Central Jersey and bring back a bed. This futon is the infamous cursed one, where the past two owners, who didn’t have kids nor really planned on any, ended up getting pregnant. I was offered it at first but I can’t even type what I told my cousin when he offered it.

So somehow we get the thing into the van (actually the frame was easy, the mattress was the pain in the ass). the trip to Jersey itself was...weird for me, to say the least. It was sorta fitting how the weekend was going, but still it was just weird. First, I was reading the directions to get to where we were going and the exit we had to take off of the NJ Turnpike, and some of the route after, sounded familiar to me, but I blew it off. As we were driving, I gave my cousin the grand tour of where I dated people. I pointed out a couple exits in Brooklyn I had taken to meet up with some of them. It felt like this route was made exactly to take us through this...Google must be pissed I don‘t use my gmail account as my main email address anymore. We get to Jersey and closer to the exit we had to exit off, and I kept saying “Well, this looks familiar”. We exited off the turnpike and seeing the direction we were going I said loudly “Oh boy, I know where we are...wow”. God can really be a prankster can he??? All this time my cousin smiled, but was silent, probably just to not make me feel more weird, and I think he knew who exactly I was talking about as far as who lived over in that area. By “weird” I mean in the “what are the odds, all this would line up like this?!?!?” As we traveled down 18, I pointed out the exact turnoff I used to take to go to where I used to go to down there. One bright spot was the emergency stop I had to make into a restaurant and left what I felt about the state of Jersey there.

We get to his in-law’s place, switched a bed with a futon, and after realizing we are old and broken down, head back to the city. I believe I made the most poignant and succinct statement about my feelings of Jersey. My cousin took a turn a little too fast getting on the Gothells Bridge, and I mentioned I rather if he rolled the van and kill us to do it on the other side of the bridge. He asked “In Staten Island?!?!?” I responded “yeah, at least it would be in New York”, and he agreed. Yes people, I put even Staten Island above New Jersey.

Finally after another stop to get more furniture from some relatives, we hike all the crap into my cousin’s place and then my weekend of work was over.

Time to start to rest and enjoy the weekend!!!! What? it’s 5pm Sunday?!?!?! damn!!!!

In the end I got a back that’s killing me, splinters in both hands, and one hand was almost crushed, and my arthritis in my ankle was acting up. But it was all worth it since the soon-to-be mother got a kick-ass shindig and was still smiling today over it.

Plus, down the road I can hold all what I’ve done to help this couple and kid over them at some point. Hey, it was done to me a few times!!!!!

Happy St. Patrick’s day everyone!!! Hope all you dumbasses who drank too much stuck things into other things that you’ll regret in 9 months and or about a decade. or you had one too many Irish carbombs, got into your car and as you drove home, swerved and turned your ride into a real carbomb. Yeah I’m in a GOOD mood!!!!


Now a great moment in irish-American History...the moment the Irish were given equal status with everyone else in this country:



One other thing I found funny today was when this bum on the train-and I do mean bum, not those PC terms like “homeless”, “underprivileged”, no BUM-was on the train preaching the word. He was talking about how the bible is the answer to everything-ironic that it couldn’t answer his question of “How do I get a house and a job?”, and he said how he doesn’t have hatred for those who hurt him and led him to where he is. When he said we should all forgive those who did wrong to us, I couldn’t help but laugh. I never understood the whole “i get screwed over by someone, so if I give him a free pass on him doing that, it’s all good.” I have no issues with anyone who choses to hold grudges and decide that a scumbag doesn’t deserve to be given forgiveness. Of course with this society and its ass-backwards thinking, that person who doesn’t forgive is called “bitter”, “angry”, and is made to look like the bad guy. If justice isn’t done on the part of the victim, that person has every right to be angry and have rage for that person or thing.

Funny how it’s the Bible is supposed to teach forgiveness. Anyone read that first part of the Bible? apparently forgiveness was God telling someone to do something or not to eat something, and when he isn’t listened to, God decides to start kicking some ass. That flood he caused and told Noah to build a boat to save only a few of the animals sure screamed “I forgive you” to the drowning wicked people!!!

Do lesson is this: It’s ok to have anger and rage for someone or something who has done and injustice to you. You as a human being is allowed to feel that. Quite honestly, if anyone comes to you and tells you that you should forgive what has done to you, they are no better than who or what did you wrong, since all they are doing by asking you to forgive is blaming you for your situation. My only catch with this is that as long as what you are angry at is not something that you did or caused yourself, then you are just a self-sabotaging jackass and deserve what you get. If you choose to get yourself into a situation with something or someone without looking into every aspect to see if it’s right for you, and you are harmed in a way, then it’s on you to accept what happens.

One other lesson I learned the past couple days is something that everyone should follow. You can analyze and think about something or a situation all you want. If you have that gut feeling saying this ain’t good and something you should not be at, or on the other hand, have a feeling that there could be something positive that could come out of a situation or something, listen to your gut. nine times out of 10, I find that the gut decision I make is the right one and I have not regretted doing so. Sure, you may miss out something from time to time, but I rather miss out on something that I felt was wrong, than be stuck in a horrible situation and be wrong.

Now you can see why I am rarely wrong? So there’s my secret.

now for some beautiful Irish music on this day:

Watch more Yahoo! Music videos on AOL Video

Wow another entry today. I must have a lot on my mind.

Well, first wanted to say that I”m still trying to figure out what to do as far as a small web site. I have the idea, just have to sit down and start to do it. I should start to do that this week, but seeing what is going to be happen the next seven days my mind may be needed elsewhere. I could have done something yesterday, but that yesterday was mostly cleaning. I chose to finally go through most of my crap and get rid os some of the stuff I don’t need. In the end I think I have about 5-6 garbage bags of stuff and some room now. On top of that, I did a ton of my laundry as well as cooked dinner last night. I did all that partly because it had to be done-well the dinner part was because I wanted to use my “Big City Slider Maker”, but also I needed to distract my mind.

See, I have a bad habit of if I am left alone for a long period of time, my mind starts to think and think and think to the point where I am almost batshit crazy. Sometimes it is a good thing to do-it sorta led to me deciding to consolidate things and try to simplify things in my life along with other things I’ve done that has bettered my life. This weekend had me thinking about how I seem to more and more sliding into a “shut-in” state. I figure that since I am not going out to a lot of things that I am invited to (though to sort of defend that part, a lot of what I am invited to are during the week at night, and I usually am too burnt out from work and/or just want to go home to get some stuff done).  I look at myself and I am not really making contact with a lot of my friends as much as I used to outside of the occasional email saying what's up.  Yeah I should try more and all that, but most of my friend have other things to do, wither with their wives/chicks, and some with their jobs and whatever they are trying to accomplish.  

Part of me sorta likes the whole being alone thing-its a simple way to live and it's peaceful.  But on the other hand, you even told me humans naturally need social interaction.   So part of me wants that.

I guess also part of the problem is what someone once told me.  I tend to be too harsh with people, in that I can't accept people who "let me down" in some form.  See, I look at it this way: life is harsh, and I have had a lot of things done/said to me that have been harsh-especially after I put my trust in them.  I am jaded by this and whoever comes into my life-either girl, boss, or anyone-I tend to be me, which apparently is real tough with at first.  This is first to "thin out the heard" of people, since I rather have 5 people who get me than 10 who don't.  Also  I believe this helps prove the other person's intentions.  If they can stand me and how I really, honestly am, then they do want to be around and me around.  If they can't then it's probably best that they don't be around.  Does that make sense at all?

I guess maybe I am getting frustrated with, although it is true more will be in the latter column than the first, I keep finding those in that latter list, and I am slowly regressing into this state of staying in my house more.  But on the bright side this may change now that the soccer season is upon me and I will get out more on Sat nights, although it still disturbs me that I am starting to not only look forward to going to Jersey, but the toilet part of it.  Maybe things will change then.

But also this could be simply my mind out of control. Someone told me once that people like me do tend to let their minds go out of control and think just utter nonsense which can hurt me in the end. I don’t know what it is, just when I have my feelings about people or situations, I am usually right. Sorta sucks about the things I am thinking about now, but they are more than likely right.

One side note that was positive this weekend. I decided to download Korn’s “See You On the Other Side” and “Unplugged” albums. Those in the know why I haven’t until now and how and why both affected me in the way it did. Anyway I chose to try to at least and see what would happen. I actually put the albums on my old Ipod in case one of the reactions included launching the player across the room or into a brick wall, and I didn’t want to do that to my Iphone. Turned out it was ok. Both Albums are good, and I am liking more and more the direction the band is going. Those this doesn’t mean much to dont’ worry about it, those who know can take it as a real positive step.

This entry I decided to talk about something I’ve been contemplating for a while now. When you boil down everything, this world is full of only two things: carneys and rubes.

Sounds dumb? crazy? well just look at everything in this world. One person has to sell themselves to others, either through legit mens, or Machiavellian ways. Take our presidents, and how the carneys that run their campaigns as well as themselves sell themselves to get elected by the mindless rubes. Most recent carney is Obama, This may piss some off, but that whole snake oil elixir of “change he’s sold to you all is nothing but that. He just signed a budget that had nothing but earmarks and pet projects. Gee, wasn’t his big platform he was running on based on changing how “same ol’ politics” worked? Of course he tried to slickly talk his way out of it, but the bottom line is nothing has changed other than it’s now Democrats using the president as a blank check to get their bullshit projects through instead of Republicans.

Another example? Gamestop. I hate this company, I know that their basis of business in bullshit. Walk in there and when you want to buy a new game, they will spend at least 5 minutes trying to sell you a used copy. this is not because its a good value to you, but simply they make about $20 off that game rather than the $3 off the new one. They also deceive people by saying they have all the latest games, but they don’t mention they under stock new games so they you may more likely buy the used game. Then my favorite one now is that one in about 8-10 copies of their games are open box, where you take the empty box off the wall, bring it up to the counter, and they put the game in or you and seal the box in plastic and stickers, and charge you for a new game. They will go on and on about how the game was never used and all that crap, but bottom like THAT’S OPEN BOX AND SHOULD BE CHARGED AS SUCH. Still they are in business thanks to the rubes believing their bullshit, as well as falling for the masking of “store exclusives” when you buy a game from their store. I rather wait a couple days ordering form Amazon than give these carneys my money.

In business there are other examples, those crooks like Madoff and Stanford, who bilked people and non-profit entities out of billions of dollars, ruining lives. The banks that preyed on the stupid and irresponsible with the mortgages and led to the situation we live in now, while bullshitting they way into Congress and taking billions of the responsible people’s money to continue heir flawed business model. the entire Kennedy family were a bunch of carneys and scammers which is how they made their fortune. Hell, World Wrestling Entertainment, a multi-million dollar business, at the heart of it all are jin a business that is nothing but full of carnies.

Even in interpersonal relationships there are carnies and rubes. I fell for a few carneys, some more than once, since their bullshitting skills were good. I learned now what to look for in one of these fucking scumbag carnies, and I am less likely to be a rube in that way. THere are some situations where the guy beat the hell out of a chick, and can carney his way back to her. Honestly, if a chick is going to be stupid enough to go back to him, she deserves whatever happens to her-be it more beatings or her corpse is found in a ditch. I would shed no tear for any rube dumb enough to go back that shit.

Quite honestly, I have no sympathy for anyone who was duped by these people and made to look like a bunch of ham-and-egger rubes. People should pay attention to all that is around them and that they are getting involved with. I do have a little respect for those who do take responsibility and does say “hey, I screwed up and it’s my fault that I am where I am now.” Unfortunately this pussy of a society wants to coddle people and allows these losers to pass the blame on someone else, which doesn’t help solve the problem. All passing the blame and coddling these people does is tell the other losers “Hey, it’s OK if I fail, someone else will take the blame and I don’t have to deal with the responsibility of failing”. THIS IS WHY THE COUNTRY AND PLANET IS FUCKED RIGHT NOW!!!!

I was told I’m too harsh with people, and that I should cut people slack. I won’t since this world is supposed to be cruel, and people have to learn to grow a thick skin and learn that you will fail more than succeed. You will fail a lot, but you have to take responsibility for that failure and learn from it. But most people are too sensitive and they get some rube to take the blame so they can live in the world of ignorance and fuck even more things up. Want to live this way? don’t come near me and expect me to be nice.

I said there are both carnies and rubs out there, but also remember that a rube may be a rube in one situation, but the carney in another.

So this is the first blog post I am doing with Apple’s Iwork09 suite. It’s a nice setup. Doesn’t have all the bells and whistles as MS Office, but it works pretty well. I just wanted to write and see what it was like.

Also have to plug Lazlow and his radio show. His next episode is Sat, March 14th. So Sat. night I am going to stay in, maybe drink a couple beers and let Lazlow, Big Wayne, and Reed Tucker entertain me. Yeah, I”m slowly turning into a shut in. I should write about that stuff another time, when I have time to figure out those thoughts.

I got some great news from the tax man today, I am getting a sweet check from both the Feds and the state. it’s enough to really put into motion my plans for a Mac Mini in my living room. I still have to research quite a bit to make sure I know what I am doing, but I will be able afford the project. And not only that, i also have enough to put into saving s as well, which quite honestly is the more important thing to me. On a side note, I did use my Apple TV, which ironically would be replaced by the Mac mini,and rented “ghostbusters” tonight. I’ve heard a lot about the game coming out for it, and I jsut had a “bug” to watch the original. It wasn’t a HD version of the movie(blu-ray version comes out soon though), but the quality was very good. Also it seems the version Apple has is the one with updated sound from one of the DVD releases. ALways a good movie, and I found enjoyment. On top of it, the rental through Apple was $3. I was disappointed they didn’t have another classic I wanted to see again. Apple didn’t have “Used Cars.” If you haven't seen it, shame on you, and go out now and look for it to see. You’ll find it funny as hell.

Finally before I go to sleep, and just to remind you that “the Lazlow Show” is on tomorrow night at 9 on XM202 but you can get mp3’s of the show and the box set of all his shows on lazlow.com, He had audio of this drunken hayseed ranting about current events. Here’s the rube’s Youtube channel, and it’s funny to see what happens when mommy and daddy are also brother and sister.

here’s his channel:
http://www.youtube.com/user/walstreetpro2

and the one guy’s rants I like better-drinking with Bob:
http://www.youtube.com/user/drinkingwithbob

I"mnot in a good mood. Apparently Myspace thinks this is a bad forum full of spam and viruses. I find this ironic since the ads they have on their site is nothing BUT fucking malware and viruses. This really pisses me off, since they are either pissed that I don't use their dogshit of a blog setup, or someone decided to flag my post. They either are someone jealous of me or some pathetic piece of garbage that still carries a torch for me, but knows they fucked up and know I'm not taking them back.
I"m going to try to post a link again to this site, and see what happens, but those who want to read this will find a way. At least there's always Facebook. They haven't given me shit at all. It just amazes me that Myspace would do this, I"m debating if I am going to pursue this and write to the people who run the site, but I may just not bother.

I finished "Confessions of an Economic Hitman" last night and it was ok. It proved my theory that the biggest companies in this world run and control this world. The book goes into some of the big events of the 80s and 90s like Panama, Iraq, and various other parts of the world. It's an interesting way to look at the global-economic machine, and how and why the things the US has done were done. If you look at some of the dumb things the country has done internationally, look at why these were done in the way of "how can one make money off of that action?"

Overall the book was an informative reading, for the most part. There was one big problem I had with the book. I understand the parts where he is self-reflecting on his life and saying what the effects of his job has had on his life, and I am cool with it. But when it gets to the point where he is trashing the business where his notoriety and fame came from, that to me is like "shitting where you eat." It's cool to have issues with the business you are in, but to say that you want to try to help end the business after you made your bones in, that's a problem to me. These parts of the book reminded me of all the stories of the pro wrestlers that made it big, fell into addiction, and after cleaning up they go out and preach against the pro wrestling business. When someone does this it make me think they are really saying "I made my money and got mine, not i am done in it no one else should get what I got." Of the whole book, this is where I had a big problem and I found myself trying to fast forward through those parts. I still recommend the book, it is an interesting read.

Update on some of the other things I wrote about the past couple entries; I am slowly working on things, and slowly making sure everything is right before I move to the next step.

After this Myspace thing, I just wanted to say to those who read me from there-thanks and its' probably a good idea to subscribe to the RSS feed that's available. Along with this I really don't say this much; I know I come off harsh and an asshole sometimes, but I am also a humble person. I don't say this much but thank you to all who do read this. I've been doing this for a long-ass time, and I have shared a lot of good and bad things on here. Many of you who read this I know, and I learn form time to time people who I didn't think who read this not only does, but enjoy it.
So I just wanted to say thanks.

Changes are a comin'.....

Yeah There is going to be a few changes, and after looking into some stuff, I"m making some changes here. First I will be going to get Mobile Me and use that as my personal email address, and use it to make a small site for myself-along with the disk storage and other cool features. I am also going to change some of this blog around.

What does this mean to you? the people who read this?

not much really. I will be changing the name and the URL slightly to streamline stuff. Content isn't going to change, so expect the same garbage as before. I found I can change the URL and name, and just link that to my new site with little difficulty. the old URL will still work from what I understand, so you lazy dolt don't have to do a thing.

As I said I will have a new email address for my personal emails. I'll send an email out about that when I get things up and running. As far as my current email address, I"m keeping that as my "junk" address-the one I give for websites and other stuff. Luckily I can have all that mail forwarded to my new address, and properly deleted immediately. Maybe at some point I will get rid of the account, but for a while it will be active.

This isn't a sudden thing. It's going to take a few weeks or so. I may setup things as early as this weekend to get the ball rolling, but those who I think should know, will.

In these economic times, thanks to the deadbeats and morons who deserve to lose their shit, I decided to try to consolidate a lot of my stuff. I figured it's time to cut some deadweight, and see if I can save a buck or to. Mostly, it's more just to simplify my life. I am planning on taking a look at what's left of my 401(k) at BoA and moving it over to the one I have now. I also have other accounts I have to look at and see what can be done with them. Those most likely will be taking whatever is in them and putting them in my "long-term, dream, big shiny things" savings account. I've been going around here as well and consolidating some other things, like the DirectTV thing, where it's cheaper than cable.

one other thing is I want to consolidate some online stuff. Since registering some domain names, I want to use them and build a personal website. My goal is to have one where there's a main page saying something about me, a bio/resume page, blog page, and maybe a media page for photos or videos I shoot. Right now I'm looking at places to host all this. I"m looking at mobileMe form apple, which would consolidate a lot of things into one area. I would have a new e-mail address via this way, but I would have my Gmail stuff forward to it-but use the me.com address as my main address. This is would be perminant for a lot of the sites I visit, and the me.com would be the one to contact me at. Like I said, you COULD contact me via my gmail account if I did go with MobileMe for personal emails, but the response would be reminders of not to, and would get meaner and meaner for each time my request is not honored. I'm shocked how many people still send crap to me MSN account. I DON'T USE THE DAMN ADDRESS, STOP EMAILING IT. it's only still around because it's an admin account for someone else who still uses MSN.

Now, my concern with MobileMe is space. the service starts with 20 gigs for email and storage, and 200GB of monthly data transfer. that' part is the thing: I am not sure how much is used a month by me, and how much is used by you people looking at this blog. One idea I had was to try to link this Blogger as is-maybe redesigned and linked to "domainnamewillIuse.com/blog". I have to look at the advanced options and see if it's possible here. That I think would help solve part of the data transfer limit part. I'm not sure, so I have to look around.

MobileMe is $99/year, and I could add an extra 20gigs storage for an extra $50/year. What has me really looking at going with the service is the features like:

-All my info will by synced with my phone and computers-if I change something in my Ical on my phone it will be synced with my desktop computer and web app
-access to all my apps via web, which is good if i need to use someone else's computer's web browser and access my stuff
-disk storage, where I can put stuff on this virtual "hard drive" and access it anywhere, or if it's like pics or a large file, I can send an email to whoever I want to show it a link to download said file and or photo. I can even put a password on it to make sure only those I want to see it can.
-also supersecure email system, even more than google and without ads


like I said, still throwing this around. Building the site itself would be simple since Iweb comes with my computer and uploading it would be somewhat simple. I also would like to see what other companies offer for serving and hoqw much I get for the price

what do you think? and ideas suggestions would be welcomed

I feel cool sorta. I just registered a couple domain names on godaddy.com. I registered a couple versions of my name, but not one version, some dud in England owns it/ I'm not sure what to do with my names now, I may merge all the stuff I do online onto one site. Like merge this blog, and do some other stuff on it. I"ve thought of doing a small site for myself, just never really had the energy to try. In this world of new media, I guess that's what is a good thing to do.

I had a discussion with someone today about jobs and the ones we have now and what we wanted. I wanted a job in the media-either in TV, print, radio, etc. I went to school to go down that road but it got sidetracked. First I went to the wrong school for it. Second I entered the field just when it stared to get into the mess it is now. think of the current market, like any other job market, like a giant washing machine churning and churning with more and more clothes added to it everyday. I could have continued to chase the dream, but I wanted a job where I could afford to eat, and also I learned chasing dreams could be nothing more than chasing ghosts. I did the freelance thing for a bit, but that's a nightmare. You have to work ten times as hard as a guy who works for one company, and as the years go on, the more people in the pool of talent gets more cutthroat. It's an intense, stressful gig. In the end I got to the point where I thought to myself: "I don't need this", and decided to get a regular job. I thought about it and maybe I do this blog as a way to "live the dream" in a way.

"Little Big Planet" is still an amazing game. I turned it on for the first time in a while, and the amount of creative levels online astound me. I am so intimidated to even try to create another level. I downloaded the "Metal Gear Solid" costumes and level set, and how the developers came up with a fun, creative set of levels just amazes me the power of creativity-you know, the thing most people are trying to destroy in this world? I could spend hours going through the levels out there, and there are some damn good levels, granted there are some real crap levels as well. If you haven't tried this game, please do. it's a game you can't leave feeling good.

One game that has not made me feel good is MLB 09 for the PS3. It hasn't made me feel good because IT'S NOT HERE!!!! I ordered it through Amazon, since they gave me a nice price break on the game where with shipping it cost me as much as buying it at the store with tax. It was shipped UPS, and the website said it would be delivered today. Well on the site most of the day it said it left the Long Island City site to be delivered. tonight when I got home I checked again, and it still said that. EIther the snow storm affected deliveries today, or they are taking one long-ass route to my house. Well, later on the site said they couldn't deliver and they would tomorrow. I"m pissed, but given the storm this past week, I can sort of see how they couldn't deliver on some of these streets,

Finally I am thinking of getting a Mac Mini and putting it in my living room. I am thinking of hooking it to my TV, and have that as my media center and not the Apple TV I have now. It also would be another computer to use in my house, where I don't have to go to another room to use. I could put the TV show in PIP, and check my emails or surf the web during a game looking for some info. My plan would be to hook the mini up via HDMI, which would mean I would need a switcher since both HDMI ports are used. Or I could try to hook it in via the monitor port on even component ports. I wouldn't need a backup hard drive, since I would probably stream all my media from the Mac in my room via a wireless ad hoc network. Along with sharing the media, be able to access the other files on my Imac. I wouldn't do what most do when they have a Mini as a media center-use it as a DVR-since the Satellite receiver already does that. As far as a keyboard/mouse, I would simply use the wireless ones I have now, and get wired ones for my Imac. What do you guys think? Any thoughts and/or advice?

Then again this is all dependent on how much I get back from my tax rebate. But after seeing the new specs on the minis, this idea started swirling in my head again. Plus the Mini is inexpensive and just looks cool

I"m really getting bothered by the Liberals out there. Rush Limbaugh said he hoped Obama fails, and now everyone and their other is bitching and moaning about how this is counter-productive and anti-American. Funny, when these ass-hats were bashing Bush, somehow it wasn't anti-American, and they were using THEIR free speech. Now they want to in short shut down Rush and make him apologize for HIM using his right of FREE FUCKING SPEECH!!! It's one thing if he hoped Obama was killed or harmed, that's flat out illegal (which the Post should be brought up on charges for if you think about it with their comic), but Rush just said he doesn't agree with Obama's plans and hopes he doesn't succeed. How is that wrong? Shame, the Liberals are more close-minded and more the Fascists in this country.

i love the media, but when it comes to subjects like this, it makes me angry that only one side is shown, and it's usually some ill-informed, ignorant crybaby that gets media attention. I was watching MSNBC since I was stuck home for a short while, and there's this dumb piece of garbage named Mika Brzezinski. this unsexy whore has no business in media, since she has proven that she must have failed journalism 101. She sits there, talks over EVERYONE on the show, editorialize after every story....NO ONE GIVES A SHIT WHAT YOU THINK, YOU DUMB WHORE!!! and she just sucks on the air. Her voice have me a headache, and she tries to be hot but in that desperate-to-get-laid-at-60 way.

This isn't just her in the media, and female anchor is just as bad. Wanna know how they got their jobs?? look for the white residue on the corner of their mouths. Morning news has gone with the hot sluts to do traffic and weather, but they are the news skanks-the next generation. I want to learn Spanish since the Spanish stations got it right-Hot chicks who seem to know what they hell they are doing. seriously, it's like watching a porno with headlines when you watch Spanish television.

Finally, someone I know has an AIM away message that is a lyric form a song. I think it is "divas is just a female hustler", or something to that effect. In reality "Diva" is nothing more than a nice way to call a woman the C-word. Think about it and how the word is usually used, and you'll see that I am right. Of course the brainless morons puts the word on little girls clothes and that just perpetuates the materialistic "brand names or nothing", gold-digging mentality that some women believe in.

OK, the "Pete's bitter about women" remarks should start in 3...2...1....

I"m sitting here watching the snow to fall, and hoping the office is closed. I highly doubt it, so I am getting up earlier to get in. I have to since the awesome MTA is so horrible at both managing money and the system, I am not sure if the train is going to even be running. The MTA stinks, but that's with all the government agencies. I find it insulting and aggravating that I, a responsible person who knows how far his money will go, has to support a bunch of deadbeats and parasites who have no respect or knowledge to fucking say no to an impulse buy. I wrote a lot of my anger about these scum, so I won't get into it. Before you crybabies go "but there are those who really are victims to circumstances like medical bills, and catastrophic events in their lives..." I know that, and for every one of these people there are at least 100 of the scum who should just be executed in order to cut our losses.

This week was the start of Lent, and a reminder of how horrible I am as a Catholic. I didn't get my ashes on Ash Wednesday and did eat meat that day and Friday. that is not good as a Catholic. On top of it I haven't been to church in several years-last time I was in a church was for my Dad' funeral. I may not be what the Catholics would consider a good person, but I feel I am better than most of those who really think they are "Good Catholic people." I never killed a person. I have no need to bang another person's wife. I stand up for those I feel are wronged. I do a hell of a lot for others. I just do the right thing, or at least what I feel that is the right thing. I follow a lot of the lessons my father and my family has instilled in me, and if after all that I have done isn't good enough to get into Heaven, so be it. To me if all I do isn't good enough to be there, I have no need to be there since that would mean I would have to go against what I was taught by parents, which would be against one of the Ten Commandments.

Also, this week I picked up a couple games for the PS3. First I got Street Fighter 4, which is the long-awaited sequel to the long-running series. this series spawned an entire genre in video games, and after all these years it's still the best series. So far I am cheating to get al the hidden characters before I start to really play it. It's not the best to play with the regular game controller. they sell arcade sticks, which look like the type you find in arcades, but I am not going to spend $150 on something for one games. They sell a different controller that supposed to be easier to play the game, which down the road I may take a look at. Don't get me wrong, the game plays good with the controller, but the regular controller is not made for these types of games.

The second game I got is "flower" that is on sale on the Playstation Network. It's a game, but more of an art project. you fly around with pedals opening other flowers, which brings the areas where the flowers are "alive" (like turn frown grass to luscious green), and the landscape changes to become more beautiful. You can't "die" or lose in "flower", so there's no real penalty if you don't get what you have to do done. The goal is to open all the flowers. I find this game more of an art project, but also a good demo of the "sixaxis" controller capabilities (the stock PS3 controller, where it can translate how you move/hold the controller into actions on the screen on some games), as well as the graphic power of the PS3. the game looks amazing, and is something that all PS3 owners should look at. It's only $10 bucks and something that can be relaxing and fun to do once in a while.

One more review I have to give is on the "Big City Slider Grill." Yes, I fell for the awesome selling power of Billy Mays and got it. It's a pan with five cutouts that you put balls of ground beef, chicken, turkey, or anything you want to cook. there's a scoop included to measure out the beef. After you fill the spaces and put the top on, you start to cook it on the stove. You press down on the top to form the burgers, and after a couple minutes you take the burgers out. It's a little hard to since there grease splatters up and sits in the spaces due to no draining. After cooking each batch, it's best to drain the pan. what's cool is the design of the pan allows you to easily drain the grease with little mess. Cleaning it up is not a big problem, and it's good that it's non-stick, so it's not a big deal. It also comes with a bunch of instructions to make different types of burgers, so you can make a variety of tasty treats. I recommend it especially if you want to make a quick meal. It's not a faulty gimmick like the "Shamwow".