Trouble in the Terraces of my mind

hey...me writing here is a hell of a lot cheaper than therapy...

Saturday, July 31, 2004

AAAAARRRRRGGGGGGHHH...Natural light!!!

-Ever notice that sunight sucks after it burns you? I feel like a vampire in my house here staying away form a windiw where lights coming in
-I was supposed to go to Jersey today, and maybe Middletown Tomorrow, but like last week I cancelled my plans for the entire weekend....gotta find something better to do than sit around a think about all the thoughts in my head
-Mets finally got a entire pitching rotation, but they had to sacrifice their future for it. They are finally acting like a real ball team, more worried about the now than the future...
-Gee for a company that can get the best teams in the world to play soccer in the states throughout the summer, you'd think they could get better offices outside Teterboro airport!!! But I guess that' show they are rich, by being cheap (too bad the guy that owns the company tried that with the Metros when he ran them, and they are just gettingout of the hole he put them in). That's why I won't go see Man U at Giants Stadium, I feel wrong giving that crook my money.

Friday, July 30, 2004

Man this sucks. I got a sunburn on my arms, face, neck and head!!! I got it form being outside yesterday, and I didn't realize how long I was out in the sun until I got back and it started to hurt and I was niuce and pink. I was to go to Jersey tomorrow with some people but I am not now since it involves being outside the entire time. So now I have to figure out what I can do this weekend that is mostly indoors. Since I have this sunburn, I have to let my hair grow out since it's too intense of a pain to shave it.

Wednesday, July 28, 2004

-Well, had my big to-do at Amex today....what a waste of time!! First the herd me and 8 others like cattle into a couple small rooms to take tests on computers.  The tests were math and reading comprehention tests (both 20 questions in 20 mins).  I felt like I was taking the f-ing SAT all over again!!!  The math part was complex as hell, mostly things related to interst rates of bank accounts and crap like that.  I barely had enough time to get it all done in 20 mins.  The reading comrehention part also was a pain in the ass, some of the most boring crap and the questions were all curveballs.  The last part was like my Pathmark test, where they threw you a ton of questions (some repeated, but worded differently), to test my consistancy of answering questions.  I"m glad I didn't get the interview.  The people there were shady, and something didn't feel right.  Best thing that got me was I was a communications graduate, what the F do I know about finance?!?!?!

-"Rescue Me" on FX is the best show on TV.  Denis Leary is fantastic and he should really be still doing his old show "The Job".  I say should because ABC (where "The Job" was aired) chose that every week they;ll change the showtime, and then they can the show due to low ratings.  Back to "Rescue Me", it really shows what Firefighters go through, especially Leary's character, where he has to deal with the ghosts of his past (family members, especially one that dies in 9/11, past people he resued, etc.).  It's a really powerful show, much like what "the Shield" was to cop shows, this show is to firefighter shows.  It's also a funny show as well to cut the tension in the show. 

-Metros are going into the all-star break with a win, after beating KC tonight...and they are still in first, but as long as they are ahead of DC, it's all good!!!!

Tuesday, July 27, 2004

And I got $40 out of it, just gotta wait 2 months to get paid!!

so I go in and did my duty for "tha man" this morning.  Things went great since I was in the first group picked, did the jury questions from the judge (who looked like he lived in a tanning booth), and the lawyers, I along with 2 others in the first group of potential jurors weren't picked.  I go back to the central jury room and I was told I could go home.  I thought I would be coming back tomorrow, but the officer gave me the paper saying I served and I was on my way.  So I didn't have to redo my appointment tomorrow.  After I got out I felt good, and still do, but now I'm getting nervous and worried about the thing tomorrow.  I think I will do well, but you never know...

Monday, July 26, 2004

DAMN THA MAN!!!!!

Well, it seems that they want my presence at court tomorrow morning at 9am.....this certainly sucks!!!!  Well I hope I can get out of it trying the "Unemployed but have a meeting about an opportunity" angle tomorrow when they ask me why I couldn't serve.  If not, I will be one unhappy juror to say the least.  If i'm stuck doing this BS, I truly hope I can reschedule this thing on Wed.  Usually I wouldn't be so irritated about this, but the fact that AmEx called me from seeing my resume really makes me feel I have a good chance at getting a gig with them.  That's why I seem a tad jaded about Jury Duty. 

2 days to go

     It's only Monday and I'm already nervous about this thing on Wed.  I'm doubly nervous not just about the actual thing on Wed., but also the fact that I may be called into Jury Duty before then, and I 'd have to miss the damn thing.  So after 5 today and throughout the week I have to call a number to see if I have to report to one of the courthouses here in Queens.  Needless to say I won't be a happy camper if I hear the computer on the other side of the phone say "report to the courthouse blah blah blah...."  Should that happen, it would just be another thing in my life that doesn't go "1-2-3".
 
     Don't ask me why, but it seems the simplest things and most routine things don't turn out that way when I'm involved.  It really pisses me off.  whenever someone tells me something "should be easy as 1-2-3", they usually turn out to also have a 1a, 1b, 1c, etc.  that cause me to get really angry and frustrated.  So now whenever tells me that phrase, I have to use every ounce of restraint I have not to choke that person!!!  Then again this is the story of my life, so it shouldn't really shock me if all these plans go straight to hell this weekend. 
 
     Well on the bright side, this weekend went ok as far as my sports teams go.  The Metros did something they haven't done in a while, beat Chicago Sat night, and giving the head Coach Bob Bradley his 100th win in MLS.  He's the first coach to get 100 wins in MLS (ironically, most of his 100 wins came when he was head coach of Chicago).  On the other hand, the Mets did blow a good chance to gain ground in the playoff race by losing both games against the Braves.  Honestly, the may have lost 3 if the Fri. night game wasn't rained out.  At least The Red Sox took 2 of 3 away form the Yankees.  Made me feel better after seeing that.  Only thing better would have been if some of the Yankees did get hurt in that "brawl" (more of a sissy-slap fight).  This is bad when the traditional bench-clearing brawl is so wussified with he threat of suspensions from the dictators in the MLB office.  What happened to the players policing themselves, that always made the game great (this also applies to other sports as well).  Guess those PC fascists  must be so proud of taking away all the fun by getting Lawyers involved in anything the common person would find entertaining.  As I say in life "When lawyers get involved, all the fun is gone".
 
     I hope there is something interesting on TV tonight, since everyone is going to cover the week-long infomercial/propaganda fest by the communists up in Boston, crippling that city by only shutting down a major transit hub and major highway.  It is a stroke of genius to hold an event that you promised the city's population would bring in $100 +Mil in revenue, but now will end up costing the city 50, while inconvenience thousands on their way to work....Then again they BS artist that said this was the alky that drove his date into a lake where she drowned, and didn't get charged for it.  After this monstrosity, a couple weeks later the religious fundamentalists fascists have their event here in NYC, which will cost us millions while crippling the entire city for something where nothing new will get done.  Oh that's right, wrestling is on tonight, where the people on there are more believable than anyone speaking or attending either "conventions"....

Sunday, July 25, 2004

I feel better tonight...

....After talking to someone.  I was sitting here online tonight while watching boxing on HBO tonight, and I just felt down.  I felt down thinking about how everything has turned out for me.  Well, after a couple hours of just tooling around the net, I happen to notice this person online.  We started talking about different things (nothing really exciting), and for a while I felt better. We chatted about what I was down about for a little bit, but we changed the subject to something else.  After a while this person went to sleep, and I was sitting here thinking how much better I felt after talking. 

basically what I'm saying is that if you are know someone is down, just start talking about anything, not necessarily about the problems you or they got, but anything.  If you or that person can get their minds occupied about something else for a bit, usually you or they feel better....That is unless they go back to that they were worried about!!!

Oh, and if the person I'm talking about happens to read this, thanks! (don't want to give out who I'm talking about out of respect, plus I don't want that person pissed!!)

Friday, July 23, 2004

My luck, the one weekend I want to do something....

     SO it's going to rain all weekend....usually this doesn't bother me too much, but this time it does since I sorta have plans this weekend!!!
     I really didn't have definate plans, just ideas as far as what I  would like to have done.  I had the idea of going to the Metros game tomorrow and ususally i'd go even if the weather sucks.  The only thing is that I have to choose between this or going out on the Island with some friends, since I only have enough money to do one or the other.  The way i feel now I should just bag it this weekend and hang out at my house.  Seeing the weather forcast I may end up doing that....man I wish I had a girlfriend, at least that would kill my bordom!!!!
     On the bright side, I have a workshop/potential interview on Wed. afternoon.  It's with American Express and I hope I can get it.  They actually contaced me about this after seeing my resume on a website.  Hopefully it all goes well.  The only potential problem is that i'm have call-in  reserve jury duty that started today. I'm praying that I don't get called in for it between now and then.

update

anyone can now post comments.  I had to change a setting I forgot to change, so now if you want to bitch an moan about what I wrote you can

Thursday, July 22, 2004

My Buddy



     This is Stache, he's a 9 year-old Springer Spaniel.  He gets his name from the brown on the left side of his face, it goes form his nose to the brown on the side of his head.  It looks like half a mustache, hence his name.   He's my buddy.  The reason I'm writing about him tonight is because when I was playing with him today, I realized how great of a dog he is, and that he had to overcome a lot in his life.
      First he has epilepsy.  We found out this early in his life when he had a couple seizures.  We also noticed that when we would see him in the morning, he would be wet on his chest (possibly from drool during the seizure.)  The Vet put him on some medication that he still takes today. Since he has been on it, he's only had I think 3 episodes since then. 
     After this started to clear up, he started to have skin problems.  It first started with him scratching all the time.  At first we thought it was dry skin, and started giving him something to help with his skin.  It didn't help and he started to scratch so much he would pull out hair and bleed.  We kept taking him to the vet, and he was stumped.  He first thought Stache had a allergy to beef, so we started him on a lamb diet (still on it).  It helped a bit, but he still had problems with scratching.  It pained me to see him suffer and I felt horrible.  Eventually, we took him to a specialist on Long Island, where she found that he had a auto-immune disease that made his immune system attack his skin cells.  She prescribed a medication for him and it worked to a point.  He stopped scratching a lot and seemed to be getting back to his mischievous ways. The only thing was his bald spots weren't growing back.  After a time the specialist took some blood form him  for a blood test, where it was discovered his liver was being damaged from the medication.  Luckily she know of another medication and put him on that...WHAT A DIFFERENCE!!! He started to get his hair back (has all of it now), and seems to be acting normal
(a pain in the ass!). 
     So now he has hair, it's 3 shades of brown, but he has it back.  As you can see he is a good-looking dog.  He isn't to friendly to people at first, protective of my family, and is really attached to my mom.  It's so bad, if she gets up to go to another room for a second, he has to follow her, even if he was asleep in the first room!!!!  It's funny to watch, at least to me that is. 
     He's not the smartest dog, or is the greatest guard dog (cats have been known to walk in front of him and he never notice!) , but he is a good dog.  I"m amazed how he's turned out.  I was worried at one point we may had to put him down because of this, but I'm thankful he's better.  Only thing is that he's on all these different medications for the rest of his life, and it's like he almost taking medication every 4 hours (all the dosages are split up throughout the day), but he doesn't mind since the pills are put in things like ham (has to be boars head, he's a gourmet!!), bread, or Kraft cheese (again, he's a gourmet, won't eat the cheap stuff!). 
     That's my buddy, he can't help look that good..when he's around an owner as good looking as me, it can't help but rub off on him!!!


Weddings

     I'm the best man at a wedding this September, and as cool as it is, I think weddings are overdone.  I'm watching the future husband and wife planning this thing and all I (and the groom at many points) are dollar signs flying around.  That's why if I do get married, it's going to be simple, and hopefully not cost more than 500-1000 bucks:

 
  1.  the guestlist will be limited to no more than 100 total!!!  it should be limited to family and close friends.  Anyone else want to send gifts/money they can
  2. the actual wedding/reception will be done in one place (this is how this wedding in Sept is set up) it lowers the cost of limos and church.  plus, easier to access the alcohol.  Best place would be at a large house with a big backyard/patio.
  3. cash bar, cash bar cash bar (especially if it's at my house, it's called recouping my loss)!!!! luckily it's open at the wedding i'm going to be at...WHOO HOO!!
  4. no fancy flowers or crap like that, something simple
  5. wedding photographer, no video-who watches that tape after the first week other than to blackmail a relative after his drunken rant about how hot the bride's maid is...
  6. no DJ's I hate them, they force people to do stupid things, and they cost money...a stereo and a stack CDs is good enough
  7. cheap champaign, nothing fancy.  No need for Cristal or anything, this isn't a P. Diddy video!!

 

Now, my ideal wedding, would be in the back of my house with reception on the first floor, where all there would be are 3 kegs, some chips and pretzels.  the actual meal would be done on the grill outside and it would be make your own burgers or dogs.  There would also be the option of chicken, but again, grill your own.  seating would be wherever your ass fits, and any dancing would be done in the middle of the rooms, where also any fights will take place.

Wednesday, July 21, 2004

Well, this night sucked!!!!

-The Metros fail to advance in the US Open Cup (one of the oldest tournaments in the world.)  It's a tournament where all professional and amateur soccer teams in the US can compete in a single elimination format to see who is the best team in the nation is (picture the NCAA basketball event on crack), The Metros lost to a team form the A-league (like a minor league team, but isn't...hard to explain).  Last yeat the Metros fell just short in winning this Cup, losing to the Chicago Fire in the finals at Giants Stadium.  This Cup is different than the MLS Cup (considered the League championship).

-I started reading The Bad Guys Won! by Jeff Pearlman.  It's about the 1986 Mets, and how rowdy and out of control they were during this time.  I've gotten about a 1/4 of the ay through and I have to say it's a fantastic book that really shows how the players really were.  Most of them were asses, but they played hard and were a family.  Like I said in another post, I miss teams like this, it made being a sportsfan fun thinking these guys are just like us, just with a little bit more athletic talent.

-Speaking of the Mets, they got swept tonight by the Marlins.  good to see they are taking this pennant race seriously, since there's no chance in hell they'll get a sniff of the NL Wild Card...

Tuesday, July 20, 2004

I can't sleep...

It's about 1:30 right now and I can't sleep.  Why you ask? Mostly because my mind won't shut the f up!!! I lay down in bed and all I hear in my head are random thoughts I've had.  Most of the thoughts revolve around my past, something I've been trying to let go, but can't for some reason.  I keep feeling I'm trapped in a box like a mime and I can't find my way out of it.  I don't know If I should be sharing some of this ina forum like this, but I find typing/writing things out can be therapeutic.
     I am the anti-Midas.  All the things I touch or get involved in turn to crap.  Be it relationships. Jobs, anything.  I don't know why this is, but this has been happening since I graduated from college.  After college, I thought that crap people always told me that I'll have no problem getting a job right after college may come true.  It did partly, I got my summer internship at a local cable television station in NE Pa.  Well, during this time, I learned a lot, and had another bunch of crap fed to me like a pathetic starving puppy.  "Oh, don't worry, once your internship is done, you'll have no problem getting a job notonly here but in the region at another station should you choose to do that!!" 
     Well, after my internship, technically it was true.  I became a freelance videographer (PC term is "independent Contractor").  At first it was Ok, I had good amount of work and all, but I wanted something more stable (and with bebefits).  Well, lo and behold the company wanted to interview me for a position in the news department.  SO I first get told I have to talk to the HR person ("but don't worry, it's just a formality, you as good as gold for this job" said people).  After meeting the HR person, who had a 70s porno moustache, the tells me he talked to the general manager of the station (who had no idea about my work or professional relationship with me, I didn't work directly under her) and they both felt I didn't have enough experience for the position (one that said "no exp. required" on the description) and I should stay freelance to get more experience.  So 2 people who have no idea about what I did during my internship that made me more than qualified for the job knew all about me to make this judgment, and NEVER talked to my boss, head of Creative Services about me.  Right then and there I should have left the company, but I needed the work.
     So after a few months of working there and making friends with some higherups, I get a call form the head of the news department one morning at 8am. She wanted me to meet her for an interview at 10.  I asker her if the time could be changed, since I had gotten home at 2 am after another shoot for the station.  She seemed in a bad mood from the start and wouldn't change it.  So I had 2 hours to get ready for an interview, and 1 of those hours will consist of driving to the station.  I showered and started running around my house like a madman, getting the least wrinkled shirt and pants to wear and trying to print out my resume.  I haul ass to the station, and get there just in time for the interview, which consisted of a test about cameras and a mock interview where I had no info about it (something that never happens in real life).  So I think I do ok, and had to hang around the studios for 2 hours (had something to work on later that day, so I figured to stay there).  A week later the GM calls me.  She said I didn't get the job due to my unprofessional attire I wore to the station and that although I have the skills to do the work, they can't offer me the job.  But on the bright side, she did raise my pay from $6.75 to $7.00, and that she gave her word that I will be hired the next round of hiring occurs.   Again, I should have left right then and there, but I stayed.
     During this time, more and more High School kids were hired as freelancers, and as you know no one is more able to handle the maturity and professionalism of a job than a high school kid!!!  Needless to say, they weren't great workers, but they were not fired since the station was so desperate for people to work.  After about 2 months of all this, I hear that one of the high schoolers was hired to work there for the summer!!! So I'm losing jobs to high school ass-kissing jizzbags.  Some of the videographers in the news department were good friends to me and thought me a lot throughout my stay there, and they were always trying to get my foot in the door.  when it was announced that this kid was hired, many of them went to the head of the news department and started screaming about this and why I wasn't hired.  It turns out she gave some BS remark, but the reason was I was friends with people in the company that she and the GM don't like.  SO after 1 1/2 years of the BS I quit on my birthday.  They thought I was bluffing, and they did eventually offered me a better job with full benefits and all, but I didn't' take it. 
     I moved home right after that, and thought I would get a job with no problem.  well9/11 happens and NO jobs around!!!  I did make some money doing odd jobs, but nothing full or even part time.  so I bounced around doing this, along with taking different classes.  (I'm not getting into to many details about this part) I was looking seriously into medical billing classes, but a relative got sick and I chose (CHOSE) to not take the class and stop looking for work in order to help out with my sick relative and his wife.  This is something people to this day criticize me for doing, but I have my reasons for doing it.  I did it because it was the right thing to do.  So Everyday I drove to and from the hospital, and doing errands for my relatives.  unfortunately, the relative in the hospital passed away.  SO not I"m back looking for work (and did take the course).  I never relize how much of a negative impact the gap I have in my employment would make.  No matter how much I explain it to people, I still look like a loser in their eyes.
     My thoughts at night revolve aroundthe question "Did I really do the right things throughout my life?"  I honestly don't have a clue.  I think if I didn't choose to help my relatives, I may have looked like a monster to them and the guilt of not helping would eat at me.  I also think about the repercussions about helping them.  I lost a relationship with a fantastic woman (long distance).  we planned on meeting one day, and the money I saved to go see her I used to live off of during this time of helping.  In the end she found someone closer because she was tired of waiting for me to see her.  I do think about how things could be different if I did see her, but I also try to not at the same time, brings up too much pain.   I also think about the lost job opportunities as well, but I was told the economy in the near future would be good again, so I thought there would be a job waiting.  I'm 25 and have nothing as far as a career. I hate talking about jobs/career with others because I feel ashamed, partly because of the things I chose.
 
but I have to live with these choices I made.....Now I got this out, hopefully I can get some sleep.
 

Monday, July 19, 2004

Monday night's thoughts...

     Since Saturday, I"ve felt a hell of a lot better.  unfortunately, my father screwed up his heel (more of a reinjury), he tripped over a gate in our house we have set up for out dog, and aggravated a spur on his heel, he couldn't walk all day yesterday, and he went to the emergency room about it in it (personally I thought a waste of time).  The doctor told him to rest for a couple day and go see his orthopedic.  So for a couple days, he's stuck in the house.  He was walking better today, but that could be aided by the painkillers he's taking....
     As far as my job search...I hate it when people ask me "any bites in your job search?" I just answer "No,  the job market just bites!!!"  Haven't heard back from anyone yet, but I do have some leads, just the thing is that for all I know they may lead me into a damn wall.   I don't know what to do, this whole thing has done a job on my head.  I"m 25, going to be 25 in August, and I have not started a career in anything yet except being a failure.  I don't know if I'm angry, frustrated, or scared, or I may be all that at the same time...It just bothers me that my dumbass hasn't gotten a job yet.  And before someone says "why not get a job in a fast food place, retail, etc.?" well, that part of the economy is even more cutthroat.  Mostly because I have to compete with the high schoolers, and other people like myself (college educated, but cant' get a real job).
     Enough about me, that's all my problem, I'll deal with it.    On another subject, I can't wait to see the "Peaceful" protesters start a fight with the cops.  The sad part is these failed abortions are going to swing at a cop, and when the cop rightfully embeds his baton into their skulls, they're going got run to their rich mommys and daddys and sue the city over brutality.  They all did this during the anti-war protests and that just got settled in court today.  At least the court saw it the cops way, but they worded it to make the hippies feel better about themselves.  I"m sick of thest protesters, most of them don't believe in what they are protesting for.  most of them are doing it because they want to be cool and non-conformists (sort of like what most "punk" rockers are now, want to be different but they a part of the punk "culture" by conforming to that standard).  I hated these air-stealers in college.  When I see these "People", I think the saying fits perfectly (Don't remember who said it):
 
"The worst part of freedom of speech is that everyone's guaranteed.."
 
     By the way, a book just came out about the greatest team in the history of organized sports....That's right the '86 NY Mets.  I can't wait to read it because it apparently describes the Mets were like a frat.     I remember in the 80's and early 90's when all baseball teams were like that, full of guys that went out and played their guts out on the field, then went out that night and partied that hard.  They didn't have personal trainers there to tell them when and how to do everything.  None of the real players in the past worked out in a gym before/after a game, in fact I think most of today's injuries are cause because of this mentality.  You never heard of Lenny Dykstra, Dareen Daulton, John Kruk, or Rob Dibble doing anything players do today as far as working out.  They would just show up their job, and goout and party with the common man that night (and maybe kick some ass at the same time).   Former Phillies player John Kruk said it best one night to a woman asking about how he can look so out of shape and still play baseball.  He said "Lady, I'm a ballplayer, not an athlete!!"  I think if I could assemble a team full of players with this mentality, it would dominate baseball.  All they would do is play their hearts out and give everything they got to win the game.  My pitchers, both starters and bullpen, would not be afraid to try and decapitate a hitter if they were showed up by them. 

Saturday, July 17, 2004

My Sat.

     I haven't felt good all day.  Maybe it's because I didnt' get a whole lot of sleep last night or just the after affects of drinking last night.  For some reason, I didnt' feel like I was firing on all cylinders.  
     Today I went with my cousin, his Fiancee, and her parents to get fitted for a tux.  I had to go since I'm my cousin's best man.  I don't really remember much about the whole experience, but I do remember the guy helping us had one of those frilly pirate shirts on and tight black jeans.  The tuxes we (or should I say, the blushing bride chose, it is her day after all!!) looks pretty sweet.  They're black, and my cousin's going to have a platinum vest and tie, while I will have a red vest and tir to go with the brides' maid's dress.  Unfortuatly, my suggestion of all-white tuxes was somehow shot down quickly....
     After the trip to the place, I hung out with my cousin for a little bit to watch the baseball game.  After a few innings of watching the Mets fall apart, I went home.  I didn't feel to great all day, but for some reason I fel worse after I left my cousin's house and came home.  The reat of the day is a blur, I dont' remembe much of what I did.  I remember at dinner, I didn't have much.  I felt full and really didnt' want to eat (might have been the Chinese food I had earlier, in fact maybe that's want making me feel like crap).   I was supposed to go out tonight and hang out with my friends downtown, but I just didn't feel like sitting on a train and in a bar feeling the way I do.  I can't really describe how I feel, it's like I'm full, but also like I want to puke.  I'm also lathargic, so maybe I'll get to bed early tonight.  this weather isn't helping it either.  Hopefully Ifeel better tomorrow.

BOOYASHAKA!!!!

     Da Ali G show is coming back to HBO Sun. night (and they are showing some of the past season right now as I write this).  It's not a bad show, sometimes it seems to drag on.  When the skit works, it's works great.  If it sucks, it feels like the skit runs forever.  It is one of those shows you either like or not.
 
     How about those Mets!!!!  Just when they are about to reach that brass ring, the fall off the chair they were standing on and fall right on their asses!!!  Watching Ty Wiggington after the news he was going to be traded has given me an idea, tell the entire team they are tradeable and the Mets would be unbeatable!!!!
 
     F the Yankees (or as they are called in my neighborhood, "Da Jankees").  I hope the rumor of Randy Johnson is going to be traded to then is false, I'd love to see him go to the Sawx (as a Mets fan, I am also a Red Sox sympathizer).  Could you imagine the sox with Shilling, Johnson, and Pedro in the rotation?  That would bring things to this world of biblical proportions!! I'll be honest, I wanted to see a Cubs-Red Sox World Series.  I was interested to see what the apocalypse would have been like....
 
 

Thursday, July 15, 2004

I can't believe enough people watch these POS

I don't know about you, but I find it amazing that "entertainment news" shows are so popular.  What scares me even more is that people watch these shows more than the real news!!  Apparently, there is a need for programming full of fluff news about people who barely have talent to work at the movie theatre, yet somehow BS/slept their way into a million dollar gig.  Then there are the "anchors" of these shows.  Most of them have that fake, radioish voice that almost makes my head explode.  On top of that, any lead-in to a story has to have a witty title, mostly something that includes the name of the moron the story's about. 
 
Also, why is it I must be forced this garbage now when I watch the legate news?  Like I care who knocked-up who, or what hack actor is divorcing another over some infidelity.  It really infuriates me that, even in the real news, you are supposed to feel pity for these people.  Am I the only one who cracks a smile when someone comes out with a horrible disease and starts crying on TV?
 
Martha Stewart is being sentenced tomorrow, and EVERY damn TV station will have live coverage of it!!!!  So it's going to be 3 hours of coverage for something that will last probably 20 mins. Christ, even the Super Bowl knows when to say "that's too much coverage!!"
 
I forgot to mention another great movie AMC was showing lately, "They Live" starring "Rowdy" Roddy Piper.  It's a cheesy sci-fi flick, but it's funny to watch because it's so cheesy and bad.
 
 

Random ponderings

-I hate the idea of all-star games. What's wrong with naming a team at the end of the year and have a event at the championship of the sport (halftime or 1st game of the final series, etc.) It's obvious that players don't like the game (they leave during the game), all they care about is the bonus they get, and usually they don't turn out to be compelling games, more like pre-season games (scrubs are in halfway). The biggest farce is what MLS chose to put a overhyped, benchplayer they were dumb enough to pay $1 mil and revolve there ENTIRE existence around the success on this 15 year old kid name Freddie Adu. First off, the kid plays for DC United (from here on they will be referred to as the scum). I hate DC, in fact I have a song I sing about them with the ESC at Metro games:

Show me the way to go home
I'm tired and I wanna go to bed
I had a little drink about an hour ago,
and it went straight to my head..
Where ever I may roam,
over land or sea or foam
you always hear me singing a song
and this is how it goes..

OH WE...HATE DC OH WE HATE DC,
WE HATE DC, OH WE HATE DC,
WE HATE DC, OH WE HATE DC,
WE ARE THE DC..HATERS!!

My other issue is that the kid's 15 and is making a total of over 3 mil/year (salary plus endorsements), and he's on the bench for most of the game!!! But he is the "golden boy", and MLS HAS to hype the kid up more...
Along with all this is that fans are idiots when it comes to voting when it comes to all-stars!! Makes me happy to know they are also going to help decide the leader of this nation...

-along with the election...I don't like either candidates!! I hated them in 2000, but I voted anyway (Pat Buchanan, he was the most sane of all of them!). Now I have to choose between the Jesus-freak hick from Texas who finds gay marriage is more important of an issue than the fact that he led people to their deaths like Lemmings off a cliff. This isn't including the rampant lying about the war and the contract that went to his buddies. It's because of him I blame the fact that I got no job due to his economic policies (the one that said "here poor countries, take the jobs form us and we'll even pay you for it too!").
On the other hand, we have helmet hair, who goes around and preaches how proud he was to serve during Vietnam, yet he came back here to protest the war and spit in the face of the country he worked for like all the other hippies at the time. I also can't stand his "I'm a common man" BS. Yeah, most common men are married to heiresses of billions, and have millions lying around to put into an election. He also is trying to get that Kennedy vibe going, and for some reason, and it annoys me.
Chat buggs me is that Bush won't lose because the better man won the election, it'll be more because they voted because people didn't like him, and that's the dumbest way to vote (not to mention dangerous as hell). I"m voting for a chimp, just because.

-best place for free porn? Google images!!! Just type in a name of a even semi-famous person, and if there's any pics of here it'll be there.

-AMC has been showing some great movies lately, they showed the Rocky series, but I only watched the first 3 (should have stopped with a trilogy, in my opinion), The best was 3. Mr. T was perfect for that part. My favorite lines form that movie

Repoter: "do you have any predictions for the fight, Clubber"
Mr. T: "Pain"

and who doesn't smile when "eye of the Tiger" comes on? That's one of those guilty pleasure songs you don't' really like to admit to liking. The other week they were showing "escape from New York", and that's a great flick too.



Tuesday, July 13, 2004

The Ten Commandments I live when it comes to the ladies

Tonight I was thinking about women. Not one in particular, but women in general. I was thinking about how they are treated by guys. I'm not going to come out here and say I'm a playa out in the world keeping the pimphand strong. If you knew me in college, you know that I didn't have much success with the ladies (doesn't help when I had a 6'1" 240 lbs. C-blocker as one roomate.) I did learn a lot about chicks and how they should be treated, mostly from watching said roomate and learning what NOT to do. So here's a list of things I found out and that I follow:

(if this makes me sound like a wussy so be it, I'll be a wussy with a chick! HA!)

1. Women should be treated like goddesses. They should be treated like the most important thing in the world. Becides, not many ladies are 10s, but there's at least one thing in every woman that makes them a 10. It's your job to figure out what the hell that is!!!

2. Never, ever miss the opportunity to make a nice compliment about them, they like it and anytime you make them feel better about themselves can and may lead to making you feel better...

3. Listen to her, you may get that nugget of info you may need to win an argument with her.
Even if you don't like to listen, act like you are and in your head reflect on something you have been thinking about, while slightly nodding to make you look like you know what the hell she's talking about.

4. Women should never cry. I can't stand seeing one cry, it makes me angry (provided I'm not the cause of it).

5. (goes along with #4). Any guy who makes a woman cry should have his ass kicked. THis is more if they physically about her, but can also be applied to emotional abse as well (the guy's cheating on her, verbally abusing her, etc.) I figure in reality, the guy doing the whooping shouldn't see any leagal reprocussions, since he's doing the right thing and the police never really do anything about domestic disterbances.

Now the last two I really believe in, violence against women really pisses me off, and guys who do this deserve whatever pain they will find themselves in (either outside or inside jail). the only time I dont' follow this rule is if the woman is stupid enough to go back to the situation....then honestly she deserves what she gets if she can't see what's going on.

6. NO MEANS NO!!! and anyone uses drugs to get the chick into bed should listen to Sublime's "Daterape song" to hear what's in their future down the road.

7. along the same subject, watch what you say when you're out on a date (and at work, this works well here too)!! The laws have really made the line between what's appropriate and what's considered illegal really blurry...Basic rule if the question "should I really say this now" comes up in your head, it means don't say it, stupid!!!

8. Find that thing from #1, and compliment the hell out of it. goes with making her feel happy and in turn you will be happy

9. No matter how stupid you think an idea is, agree with it and do it. At the very least she owes you one and again, you have some ammo for an argument on the future.

10. No matter what, always make her smile at least once a day. doesn't matter what half-assed, way you come up with, it will make her smile. Only bad thing is if it's really stupid, now SHE has some ammo for an argument!!!

Well that's all I know about women....It all sounds right to me, but then again, i'm not in a realtionship right now. Wonder if there's a connection. Could also be that thing of no money, since the saying goes "first you get the money, then you get the power, then you get the women..."

Sunday, July 11, 2004

At the Copa...

I have to say, usually I don't enjoy the neighborhood I live in, most of the people here do not speak English (though now I'm starting to learn Spanish), and generally I stick out like a sore thumb. I live in the Elmhurst/Jackson Heights area of Queens. Most of the population that live in this area are of Hispanic origin, Primarily Colombian, Mexican or Ecuadorian. This time of the year though really changes my outlook on my 'hood. First off, it's the summertime, and that means the "well-endowed" ladies of my neighborhood have their err...maracas out to show off in shirts that I envy. On top of it, the Copa America (South America's soccer championship) is going on. So add these two factors together, and you have some of the most beautiful flag displays I've ever seen. Hey I may sound like a pathetic, dateless guy, but I defy any man who wouldn't take notice of all this around me!!!!
Watching a soccer game in the local watering holes is a real experience. You do have a good time (provided you aren't there to cheer the wrong team). It is a festive, energetic atmosphere. A few months ago I went to one bar with some friends and people I know from the Empire Supporters Club (supporters club of the Metrostars that I'm a member of) to watch the US Olympic team face Mexico in a Olympic Qualifier. Even though Mexico and the US are bitter rivals in soccer, the fans we were watching the game with were cool with us. Most of the Mexican fans I was around had a great respect of the US and their recent success, but they weren't happy when I mentioned we did beat them at the World Cup in the knockout round in front of the entire world!!! After the game ended, and the US fans were leaving the establishment, no real words were exchanged, except from one Mexican fan "We got one win back, but I'm sure there will be many more battles between the teams again."
Fast forward to today. I was walking down Roosevelt Ave. and passed several bars that planned on showing the day's games. I happen to stop and read the sign in front of one bar, and a man asked me who am I cheering for in the Copa. I said I didn't have a team I am rooting for. We talked for several minutes about the game of soccer in general, especially about how the United States has became such a regional power (most consider the US as the strongest team in North and central America). I asked him if he had planned to show any of the US games coming up, especially the World Cup qualifiers. He said no, because most people here only care about their home nations. He later asked if I was going to come in to watch any of the games. I said no, since I only really care for my home nation and I'll watch them at home tonight!!
This is the problem with soccer in the US, there is an enormous untapped pool of fans and players in this country, but they are mostly immigrants, or first and second immigrants and they still have strong ties to their home nations and pro teams from their homeland. I think it's starting to change, but it's going ever so slowly. I think that once more and more generations of these immigrants are born and live here, the sport will grow more and more here.

Friday, July 09, 2004

It’s Friday night, and where am I???

Sitting here writing this!!! This is one of the real downsides of being unemployed. Having no money really hurts because it all but cuts me off from having a social life. I used to go to Giants Stadium every Metrostars home game and hang out hours before the game tailgating. I enjoyed this sometimes more than the game itself. I would show up early enough to beat the parking charge, and take out the cooler and grill, and hang out with my friends. Without a job and therefore, no money, I can’t do this. Usually it would cost me about $30 total (including tolls, ticket, and food/drink) to go to a game. Now I can’t afford to do that. I did go to a game this season, but the odd thing was that the guys I hung out with seemed different, almost like I didn’t belong there. Maybe it was because I am not at games all the time, or maybe I just really didn’t talk to them beyond the gameday. I don’t know, but I should try to make an effort to keep in touch with them.
Even if I did have the money to go out tonight, most of my friends aren’t available to hang out. Most of them have their own lives to live and I really haven’t kept in touch with them too much (distance btw Penn State, My alma mater, and here does that). Also since I’m single, I don’t really like hanging out with my friends who have a girlfriend or wife. I don’t like the feeling of being the “third person”, Even though they are cool about me hanging with them, it does sometimes feels odd.
Like I said, most of I really haven’t talked to my friends from High School. They have their own lives to live. Since I went to a college out in the middle of Pennsylvania, it wasn’t like we could just hang out (4 hour trip one-way). I can’t really blame anyone else but myself about not keeping in touch, but then again life just happens like that. As far as my college friends, I only have one. The people I used to hang out with screwed me over in some form, and in the end only my roommate from the last 2 years is the only one I can call a friend (and his girlfriend too, since she was the unofficial 5th roommate!!!).
But then again, to have money means you have to have a job….something I really need and want!!! I hate hearing people bitch and moan about how their jobs suck, the employed have no right to complain!!! In this economy it’s really hard to get work (even the fast food jobs). I still get angry about the BS that was fed to me my entire life (you know the “once you get out of college, a job is almost a certainty!!!” crap everyone told you since you were 6). My one thing I regret is going into a major (it’s under Telecommunications, but more like TV/Video) in college that I had no real connections with (not to mention that I went to the wrong school for it). I only had a couple connections in the field through my family, but God forbid they would help me out…they wanted me to earn my spot. Like most people they, along with all my cousins, got their jobs either through their friends or “daddy’s friend.” Needless to say, they really haven’t offered the same help to me….
Not working also really has done a number to my self-esteem and confidence. It really has made me feel horrible that I haven’t gotten work. I just feel like a huge failure and that I will never get work. I know this isn’t true, but this goes through my head all the time. People tell me all the time to keep trying and they believe in me, and I know they mean well. But how many times can you hear that before the words don’t mean much to you. It’s just a frustrating and frightening time in my life. For example, I jot a rebate check for my cell phone for $70, and I planned on using the money for something, but now, I have to use it to pay off my cell phone bill this month. I know I have other bills coming up, and it just adds more stress and pressure to me to get a job. Only problem is that I send out my resume to anyone and everyone, but no one is responding!!!

Well that’s enough crying for one night…planning to add some links to this site of other people’s blogs. Most of the links are of people from the Ron and Fez radio show’s message boards. Some of them have complimented me about this here, and I thought it’d be cool to like their blogs here, just as a way of saying thanks.

3 CDs in my stereo right now

I like a lot of different music. Most of the time I listen to hard rock and old-school rap, but I'm also known to listen to other stuff as well. Today I was thinking about the 3 Cds I have in my stereo right now and thought I'd share you what think about them.

1 Beastie Boys To the 5 boroughs-I was skeptical about this album after I heard their first single off of it, but after hearing the entire album I can say that this is one of their better albums. It's stripped-down basic, style is refreshing. After hearing the crap that passes as "rap" these days, with many overlapped samples and jibberish about how rich the artists are, To the 5 boroughs reminds me of how rap was in the 80's and early 90's. There's quite a bit of political rreferences in some of the songs, but it doesn't really take away anything form the album. SO far I"m digging "Right Right Now Now", 3 the Hard way", "Rhyme to Rhyme well", "Triple Trouble", and "Hey F--- You"

2. Sevendust Sevendust This is an older album, but I think it's their best album. Sevendust is a band I feel is the most underrated bands in Rock today. They have a talent to combine crunching guitars and the voice of their lead singer into a perfect combination. Best examples of this is on the tracks "Prayer", "Black", and "Born to Die". I wouldn't say really just listen to these track, but the entire album

3. The Dandy Warhols Welcome to the Monkey House This is more of a college radio station, alternative type band. I happened to hear their single "We used to be friends" one nighton the radio and I decided to pick it up. For the most part, It's one of those albums you either like it or don't. SOme of the songs are drawn out, but then again what alternative band's songs aren't. some of the standout tracks I like are "We Used To Be Friends", "Welcome to the Monkey House", "Wonderful You", and "Heavenly". This is one of those bands you happen to just find, since the industry doesn't like new, creative bands anymore.

So that's what I have in my stereo now, usually I have different Cds in it. With me, it's usually it's more of "hey haven't heard that in a while" type reason to put cds in and listen to.

BTW the title of my blog comes from when soccer fans clash in the stadium it's referred to as "trouble in the terraces". And my thoughts in my head feel like a soccer riot hence the title.

Wednesday, July 07, 2004

Random thoughts from today

-I am amused with the amount of press coverage there is in general in this world. Between the regular network news, cable news stations, and internet sites, you can find out everything about anything. The only problem is that it's not always right. Take the NY Post yesterday, which BTW the fact that there are people dumb enough to pay $71 on eBay for a 25 cent newspaper astounds me, sorta got the Vp selection WRONG!!!!! If this was 10-15 years ago, the confusion would be almost amazing. Thank God that this society is an instant gratification type and I could get the right answer immediately yesterday morning.

-I have been unemployed for a while now, and today I decided to apply to work in a supermarket, cause brutha's broke. I chose to go through their website, since I had no time to use their kiosk when I was in the store this morning, especially when I noticed it said it would take me about a half an hour to complete the process. After going through the initial pages on their application site (standard stuff-name, personal info, employment history, etc.), I started thinking why it would take so long to fill this out. After hitting the "next button on their site, I got the answer....210 f-ing questions I had to answer. I thought no problem, and proceeded to start answering the questions...One thing I noticed is that they repeat questions a hell of a lot. I figured it was a test to see how consistent you answer the questions, but when you answer a question 5 F-ING times, it gets annoying (not to mention I started to wonder if I put the same answer down for all of them.) I don't know how to feel about this application process. On one hand I can understand the idea you must screen all applicants for the best available. On the other hand, when you put complex, involving processes, you can accidentally force qualified individuals fall through the cracks. But what gets me is that companies who have these processes complain how no people are out there to hire. Ironically, when I was working Iused to bitch and moan about how companies would have half-assed hiring processes that would give the underqualified an advantage

-Good to see my NY Rangers hired a coach. I think it's cool they offered the job at first to their minor league coach, but he said he felt he wasn't ready for it. I think it's cool he chose to stay with the minor league team, it gives him at least another 2 years to gain coaching experience and confidence in his coaching abilities before stepping into the big time. Now the test is to see if he is a puppet for the inept management, or will he actually have a backbone and tell management how HE wants to run the team (assuming the NHL has a season this year) On a related note, if they sign Mark Messier that will be the worst idea for them to do. That will stump the youth movement on the team and the rebuilding of the original 6 franchise will be delayed for years AGAIN!!!

-I'm a huge soccer fan, especially for the Metrostars on Major League Soccer. I usually read the message boards of the fan site dedicated to the team. Most of the posts on the site are about the team and their performance in-game and analysis of the team overall. Now, Most of the posts have some fact and intelligence behind them. But since it is a fan site, it means that "passionate" fans post as well. Most of these post are the "shoot from the hip" style which is good and bad. Good in that you do get the fan's perspective of things, but bad in that a lot of the time it's the most unintelligent, moronic dribble you ever read. For example: the Metros lost big last Sat against their biggest rivals. Since that game most of these "passionate" fans want the team dismantled and the coach fired. Obviously they forgot the fact that the team was in first place most of the season, and the team is dead tired for playing 3 games in about 12 days. Needles to say, it has been interesting rreading/posting the debates between the smart fans and the "passionate" fans. Isn't the first amendment great!!!!

that's it for now

Tuesday, July 06, 2004

Welcome

Welcome to my blog. This is where I'm going to try and get to everyday to put down the inane ramblings that go through my head during the day. I chose this way because it's a way to put down in writing all the things that I think about. Most of this may not make sence to you, since this won't really be structured in anyway. I don't know what you'll get out of reading this and in all honestly I don't care. This is just a place where I can be me and get out all the things in my head and maybe entertain you or make you think. So lets get too it: